Is nearly 4 weeks of getting to know her, too early to tell her that I think I like her/am interested in her (as in a possible love relationship)?

There's this girl who I just recently met in a college course and have been talking to her for for weeks. I think I'm already starting to fall in love with her. She's already given me her cell phone number and we have texted a couple of times already for school projects and to say hi. She's a sweetheart who's very accepting and understanding of me but at the same time, I feel like I don't want to bother her and come off as a creeper or a stalker by texting her a lot, hence why I've only texted her a couple of times.

I really feel like telling her how I feel but the problem is, she's always very busy outside of college with looking for another part-time job, doing things for her family and doing her class assignments so I hardly ever had the chance to have a strictly alone time between me and her, like a date. Heck, not even a simple hang out. I don't know if she has a feeling for me and probably will only want to see me as a friend.

I'm reluctant to tell her after my class some day because I have the feeling that I might stress her out more with telling her about my feelings toward her since she's a very busy person, despite that I've never seen her ever angry, irritated or in any intolerant/negative sort of mood.

Idk. Should I just be straight forward and honest with her about my feelings after class following this week or wait a little more patiently? A couple of guys tell me to never hold a woman up about my true feelings because she'll eventually "friendzone" me and another guy will take her while one female friend told me to be patient and never rush a relationship. She's single BTW.


Most Helpful Girl

  • Don't listen to those guys telling you to never tell a girl how you feel because of some 'friendzone' rubbish. Maybe don't straight up ask her to be your girlfriend just yet, but you can ask her to join you for dinner, coffee, or some more intimate places so she can catch on to the fact that you're into her indirectly. Tell her that you find her really interesting, and would love to get to know her a little more over one of those.
    Should work like a charm.

    I don't think it's too soon to be already falling in love with someone. I think that with some people, the chemistry is so right and you can be so compatible that when you look back in retrospect, you started falling from the first time you hung out.

    • Yeah certainly. She was originally from Vietnam by the way. She came here in my country (the US) when she was 7. I've asked her last weekend if she wanted to go eat out somewhere and then she texted me back saying she would like to go and everything but she had to go to the college library to study for her big Chemistry exam. I just texted her right now to say hello and ask her if she wanted to go work with me on our class assignment due this Monday together and she said she has to go to church right now and do something for her family out of town.

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What Girls Said 4

  • It depends on how comfortable you feel with each other after 4 weeks and the relationship between the two of you. I think 4 weeks is okay to ask somebody out.

    • I've been figuring out a way to indirectly ask her out on a date (trying not to make her feel pressured) but she's pretty busy for most parts, even on the weekends. She does appear to be comfortable with me since she's open enough to tell me about her and her family's lives.

    • BTW, she's a foreigner who originally came from Vietnam. She came here in the US when she was 7 years old.

  • No, not really.

    • Should I just tell her after class? She appears very friendly and tolerant of me all the time I talk to her after class but I can't tell if she even has a love feeling for me.

    • Yeah, whenver it's best.

    • At least you don't irritate her. That's good.

  • Try to go out or something. After class is a bit unpractical in my opinion:) good Luck:)

    • Yeah but there's no other way for me to ask her out. She's very busy for most part, even on the weekends. The only way I can ask her out is either after class or through text message at home but either way, she's pretty busy with class assignments, job hunting and family.

    • I think maybe it would be too much for her to have a Boyfriend too. I mean if she is so busy it probably wouldn't work out. Wait until she has more time.

    • Most of the times after class, she'll either go to the cafeteria and eat with a friend or two while I hang with her or she'll go to the library and study. There were a few times where she told me she apologizes for holding me up or "keeping me bored" and I told her "No, it's never your fault. It was my choice to hang out with you". She's never appears irritated of me at all and is always very tolerant, understandable and accepting of me companying her but still. She's probably still bothered by me to a very small degree. Idk. I guess I'll just wait and find out later.

  • i think a month is a good amount of time - tell her, you'll never know how she feels unless you take the chance. good luck!


What Guys Said 1

  • The more you wait the more chance she will find someone else.