Is this true about males? And if so why?

I was told by my gf that males look for every flaw in a women before they commit. Why is that?
Since were all human yes we all will have flaws that a no brainer but how does that effect the changes? Or what is it that males are thinking that. It hard to get it


Most Helpful Guy

  • Let me start off by saying I adore women, I'm very fortunate to have some cool gals in my life. But the truth is, there are some bad apples out there too, and "gender issues" are not something only women face.

    Because if a guy get's involved with the wrong woman, it can destroy his life, financially and otherwise.

    US Census Bureau statistic: 97% of all alimony is paid by men to women; women also receive child support the majority of the time.

    A woman in a divorce setting can get even more than just alimony and child support, but a large percentage or total ownership of some assets as well, including his business, which can be forced to close shop, putting him and his employees out of work. I know a lot of men, some of them friends, who are now homeless due to divorce--and while homeless, still have to pay the woman alimony and/or child support while she is living in his former residence.

    And a woman, whether married to a man or not, can paint a guy black and cause him to see jail time--real domestic crimes by men against women go under reported, but false allegations by definition are reported, and even being accused of something like rape, innocent or not, can cause a man to be fired from work or have other fallout. (this is why there is so much backlash against these type of issues--the "girls who cried wolf" have a lot of guys needlessly skittish)

    Also, men are also physically/emotionally abused by women (actually at a higher rate than women, interestingly), but this rarely goes reported because people tend not to care if a man is abused, and when it is reported, it's often assumed the man did something to the woman to instigate, so he can be arrested instead--this actually happens.

    So if a lot of men seem suspicious of women, it's because being with the wrong women can be very, very perilous. Fortunately, being with the right woman keeps men dating--a great relationship is worth the risk, which is why men still play the dating game.


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What Guys Said 7

  • Well, if you're talking about committing to marriage, than yes. Why? To make sure she's the one. Men who are ACTUALLY loyal men, don't want to set themselves up with a regret, because once he commits, he's committing for good.

    There are some flaws that aren't trivial that men actually have to look over. For example, what if your girlfriend by nature is a pathological liar? It might not have been a big flaw in the beginning because it was over little things ("Yeah I only stayed up until 11 o'clock last night, baby."), but once you're in a marriage, can you really ignore it anymore? What else would she mindlessly lie about? Would you be able to sleep peacefully knowing this is who she was?

    That's why. It's not because we want to run through a checklist on a woman to see if she's perfect. It's so that we can see if her positives actually outweigh the negatives, and if not, if you can still love her negatives. This is because men are sometimes very relaxed about MAJOR flaws when they are "love drunk" about their lady. So you have to be careful to make sure you don't end up marrying a woman who could easily turn on you in a second.

  • Why not? Girls look for all the reasons to disqualify a guy when they're first going out.

    Commitment is a much bigger deal for men, so we have to be more careful about it. If you don't believe me, see what percent of alimony cases are women paying men, haha. I'm betting under 10%.

    • Lmao im not saying that they can't it
      Just how my friend said it is like the guy wants to find the flaws purposely

    • It's a serious part of life. A messed up woman can land you in prison and ruin you if she gets upset--and that's not counting what happens in divorce cases. So we must carefully screen women we're considering committing to.

    • True but that just mess up even tho I know some people do that

  • Well, I think it's obvious. If you're going to commit to someone, you wanna make sure they have flaws you can deal with, so you'd focus heavily on the flaws to make sure you can passionately live/be with this person.

  • I guess, but isn't that something everyone does? I would want to understand someone as much as possible before committing.

  • I normally necessarily 'look' for flaws in a woman. I understand that I'm not perfect and no two humans are exactly a like. The whole point of a relationship, or commitment, is to change for one another. 50/50 as some say.

    So no, I don't look for flaws, but when I don't like something the woman does, I respectfully tell her and expect her to tell me, but who am I kidding? I don't even have a girl at the moment haha.

    • No I agree lol it ok your not alone in not having someone. I was worried that guys purposely look for a reason to not bother

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    • 😊 Thank you! I very much appreciated it. I wish you the best as well!!!

    • Thanks! I'll need it haha.

  • Well I always try to get to know her and try to find out her flaws that's what dating is about getting to know each other, but yeah I analyze each girl to make sure we would be a compatible match I'm not picky though.

  • I would say that's more true of females than males.


What Girls Said 1

  • Commitment is a serious matter so it is fine they look out for the plus and minus. if a guy accept you as his partner, it means he has embrace your flaws too

    • Of course it is. I agree 100% just hlw I was told it sounded like they look for the littlest thing so they dont

    • I dont think they do that unless they wanted a perfect partner which they will meet with disappointment since nobody is perfect. if i didn't pass a guy assessment because my pores are too big then i rather not be with him hahah