How do I tell this guy I just started dating that I used to only date women?

I'm 29 and since I've been like 15 I've only dated and been in serious relationships with other women. I've always been sexually attracted to men too and have had a few purely sexual relationships with guys. I've just never wanted to get in a serious relationship or date a guy.
So now I've met this awesome man. We're getting ready to go on a third date. We're both taking it slow, but I can tell we're both into possibly being more in the future. I don't want to scare him off by telling him too soon or not telling him at all and him finding out through someone else.

What should I do? How do I tell him? When do I say something? Would you be freaked out if a girl told you she's pretty much only dated women?
Any non-pervy feedback would be appreciated. Thanks!!


Most Helpful Girl

  • Make sure you tell him all about your past, so they aren't any secrets between you, because if he finds out later on this might ruin your relationship and break your heart. And this will also be a great way to find out if he is "the one" or not. If he really loves you he wouldn't care. The moment you fell that this relationship is getting serious say something like "before we become official, they are some things you need to know about me" . Personally I don't think that this is that bad of a secret, but it's your decision wether to tell him or not. Hope this helps :)


Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 1

  • I just wouldn't tell him. Heh.


What Girls Said 2

  • Wow! Have you thought he might feel really special that he is the one you want to get serious with. Of course he may need to take time to get his head around what you tell him but if he is as serious about you then he will accept your past as you will accept his.

    I wouldn't leave it too long as it will end up being much harder to do. If he cannot accept what you tell him then it was not meant to be.

    As a woman I think it would freak me out if a guy said that to me but men are different and I think female only relationships have always been seen as something close to the norm. Not that I am against any type of relationship - we all have our own tastes so should be allowed to live whichever way we like.

    Wish you luck but do tell him as if he finds out via someone else it won;t go down well!

  • It is completely up to you when you want to tell him, but be sure he dosent find out from somewhere else. Start off by asking him what he thinks of gays, then lesbians and finally bisexuals. He should have a open minded attitude. You should tell him that he is the first guy. He would probably be proud for being your first boyfriend, and might be a little turned on. He seems smart enough to understand that it would not get in you relationship.

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