Why keeping me on the line when you already confessed you're talking to someone else?

Long story short, I met this guy and I thought he was the sweetest person ever. He was cute, clean cut, and he had a good career. After being single for 3 years I thought I finally found the one.
We sat down one day and discussed that we wanted a relationship from each other. He said I was the only one who he's talking to and he doesn't need another person because he found me. He made me felt loved and wanted. We hold hands in public, we kiss in public, and we talk as if we were together.
Later on, I had a gut feeling that something is wrong. He would disappear for a whole day and night and would talk to me the next day like nothing happened. I asked him where he went and he would not answer me and talk about something else. I found out that he was also talking to another girl and I got really angry. I withdrew myself from him and he wanted to save me back. He confessed to me about her and all the lies he had made in the past. He also said he actually doesn't know what he wants and he was choosing between girls. He said he felt better for telling me and that he was stressed out because he felt that he lost me. I literally was so disappointed at him and I just couldn't deal with it anymore. I felt so broken. I can see on Facebook that the relationship between him and the other girl seemed to get closer. But, he still initiate conversation with me through text. The trend now is he started texting me and then ignore me for a week but, he would talk to me the next week. I now completely ignore him and he was a little bit mad at me. With all those random texts, that just shows that he cares and he wants to talk to me. Is it because he likes me more but then it got messed up? It seems like i don't really matter that much if he's still holding onto the other girl. And maybe vice vesa.

I tried dating other guys and that made me miss him more. He's the one that I wanted and the other guys that I was dating just don't have as much potential as him.


Most Helpful Guy

  • He's trying to hedge his bets - if one of you didn't work out, he'd have a backup. A lot of people do this until they decide they're going to be exclusive with one person. He didn't really go about this in the best way, that's for sure.

    • Now I just feel like a loser because I met him first and he chose the other girl over me.

    • Show All
    • Thank you for your advice. Yes, I'm better off without him and I'm trying to move on. He is an idiot you're absolutely right. I'm now still hesitating if I should delete his Facebook account.

    • If seeing his updates on Facebook will stop you moving on or bring back unhappy feelings, block him.

Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 2

  • "With all those random texts, that just shows that he cares and he wants to talk to me. "

    No, it doesn't. He's keeping you as a side chick in case it doesn't work out with the other girl.

    "It seems like i don't really matter that much if he's still holding onto the other girl."

    BINGO! Now you go it. Dump him and move on.

  • I wouldn't look into this too deeply. There is an underlying issue and he doesn't know what he wants. I would move on with your life and see what happens from there. Let him miss you. Do not text him or respond to his texts. If you keep doing this, he will keep working you over, trust me. This already shows some red flags, in my opinion.

    • It's just overall weird. It feels harsh when you find out stuff that like and the fact he chose the other person over you. I didn't reply him and I'm glad I didn't.

What Girls Said 1

  • This long story is not that short...

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