Did I come on too strong or am I overthinking?

I just got out of an almost 6 year relationship.. but I'm young. Only 21. This relationship has been going downhill for about a year now, so you can say that my heart has been wandering. There's a guy I've known throughout college that I've had my eyes on for quite awhile. He's been open and flirty about how he'd date me if I was single etc. Well, after things ended with my ex, we hooked up on a whim at a party. He made it very clear that he enjoyed it and continued to contact me about meeting up after work etc (we are coworkers as well). This happened a couple more times but I was starting to develop feelings that I didn't want to ruin with sex. Since I was pretty sure he liked me too, I confronted him. Apparently I was bold in that decision because he told me he wasn't sure how he feels. I told him if that was the case, then I'd back off... but he continues to send mixed messages. He flirts with me and makes it obvious that he's into me, but doesn't go out of his way to hang out with me or actually SHOW interest whenever we aren't together. He is not easy to read and it actually drives me insane. I know he's had one relationship and it was pretty damaging. I'm not sure if he's scared to start a new one because I'm fresh out of a relationship or if he doesn't actually like me. Should I play aloof? I've literally talked to him about my feelings countless times and he keeps confusing me.. Did I scare him away with the R word? Do I give up or keep having hope? PS we are no longer hooking up for fear it might ruin something potential.


Most Helpful Guy

  • Sounds like he's just looking for a booty call. Since you've told him you don't want sex, he isn't interested.


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What Guys Said 2

  • I choose what @MothMonsterMan said. I doubt there is any guy that doesn't have his mind made up. They just haven't decided what to TELL the girl.

  • He sounds wishy-washy. if he was really into you, he be all over you. Find someone that is real and can make up their mind. 'I know he's had one relationship and it was pretty damaging.' not a good resume either. Good luck!


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