Why am I so scared of women?

When they get near me i put my head down


Most Helpful Guy

  • First of all, there are a couple types of scared you can be. Your explanation will depend on which one.

    For instance, my "fear" of women originates from the idea that anything I say or do can and will be held against me. I was threatened for telling a friend she had a cute smile. I dated a girl who talked about erotic novels and asked me what kind of p*rn I like. Later on in the relationship, she tried to convince me that because I've watched p*rn, I'm sex-obsessed and don't value women as people.

    So when a girl looks at me, I glance away. Not because I'm nervous about her talking to me. I love talking to new people, and don't have too much of a problem so long as I know they're already somewhat interested in me or what I have to say. I fear making girls uncomfortable. If I were to give a girl a compliment, I want it to lighten her day, not make her feel like she can't be alone on the way home.

    I don't fear making a sexual advance. I fear what she would do with that sexual advance. A 6-year-old recently was tried and found guilty of sexual misconduct for playing "doctor" with two 5-year-old girls. Not TO them, but WITH them. He will be put on the sex-offenders list "if he doesn't kill himself before then", they said.

    In New York, any flirtation will land you jail time for sexual harassment. Regarding the recent video with a girl being cat-called and followed by guys, I'd say SOME sort of law is necessary, as I think it is reasonable for women to feel unsafe with that kind of treatment. But if male approaches are criminalized, I honestly girls should completely drop the idea that "real men approach her". By definition, it would only be criminals who approach her.

    Another reason could be what seems to be a common one, i suppose: Rejection. If you're afraid she will reject you, just remind yourself this: If you don't say anything, then you're already rejected. Honestly, hearing a "no" is one of the easier things to hear.


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What Girls Said 3

  • I was terrified of guys in middle school. I rarely spoke to them. Recently I was at a dance where I changed. I started to talk to them, and I had so much fun. I always tell myself that I can talk to boys, and it is not as scary as it seems
    :) goodluck

    • Its easier for girls

    • @Asker Not really. I heard this quote from somewhere:

      “’Why do men feel threatened by women?’ I asked a male friend of mine.
      “’They are afraid women will laugh at them’, he said, ‘undercut their world view.’
      “Then I asked some women students, ‘Why do women feel threatened by men?’ ”’They are afraid of being killed,’ they said."

      It's an extreme example but still the point stands. Trust me, women are not that bad :)

    • oh so now I'm this mean threatening person? You don't even know me and the good person I am. I used to be a nurse

  • No matter how scared you are, I was more scared.
    I would go to a dance, dying to dance, and when I was asked I would always say no.
    I would cry all the way home in my dad's car claiming nobody even asked me. WTF?

    Just go easy on yourself. You're shy like me. Take it slow.

    • Its not the same thing.. You didn't have to do the approaching like guys do.. So unfair

  • You shouldn't be scared, after all we are the ones that are terrified of guys.

    • scared to ask them out because they will reject me

    • Show All
    • I may be a kid but I observe very well, I may not understand, but I understand enough

    • Well I'm gonna leave now I hope all goes well for you because everyone deserves love. :)

What Guys Said 3

  • You fear the possible emotional letdown of her telling you "no".

    This happens because subconsciously, u don't feel like you are on the same caliber as she is. You're already thinking she won't be into you.

  • Because you are afraid of being judged. Don't forget, females are people just like you. You don't need everyone's approval. It is easier to just be yourself rather than questioning yourself at all times.

    • But i need a gf badly.. You dont unders3

    • Understand

    • Sure you do, but there's no point if you have to fake yourself. No need to judge yourself or question yourself, it is just holding you back.

  • Because you have psychological issues that need to be dealt with.

    • So you're a doctor to advise that?

    • Show All
    • a guy can only get rejected so many times

    • It's okay to have issues like that. But at your age, the least you should be capable of, is to acknowledge them, face the, and accept that you need help. No shame in that.

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