Should I start dating so quick after my last relationship failed?

My ex bf dumped me last weekend after 5 months of dating. I felt strongly for him and really enjoyed spending time with him. All of a sudden, he pulled the 'I'm not looking for a relationship right now' card and broke up with me.

However, there is this other guy who has been pursuing me for almost a year now. We've been on a few dates and I really like him. He seems like a decent guy and I'd like to maybe date him in the near future.

However, right now I can't stop thinking about my ex and all the good times we had together. I don't feel like I'm ready to jump into a new relationship after a week and wouldn't want my next relationship just to be a rebound.

The guy, who I went on a date with tried kissing me today after our third meeting. But I declined saying I thought we should wait.

Should I be honest with the guy I'm hanging out with and tell him that I'm not looking for a relationship right now? I would like to see him, but I'm not sure whether I can deal with it so quick after my breakup.


Most Helpful Guy

  • I beg of you; please just let this guy know how you feel. I remember one time I had this girl I was talking to; We had seen each other around before, but never really had a conversation. Now mind you, I didn't make the first move on her, she DMed me on Twitter trying to get at me. So we started texting and talking on the phone for awhile and we were really vibing with each other. We'd see each other in person at the extension campus between our 2 respective schools and I finally really hung out with her at her school's football game that I came to just for her. During that night, I met her friends, we cuddled up, and it was fun at first. At one point, she "accidentally" showed me a nude picture of herself she had taken on her phone and we ended up kissing. After we initially started kissing, she started acting weird and didn't want to kiss anymore. Later on in the game, she was walking with me until she sat down with a group of people I didn't know, and started talking to them for a long period of time and just left me standing there alone looking stupid. She texted me later on that night saying she was sorry, but she had just broke up with her boyfriend a few weeks ago, still wasn't over him, and felt weird being with someone besides him in a romantic way that night. Basically she told me she just wanted to be friends for the time being and that was fine. The next day I liked a different girl's picture on Facebook and left a flirtatious comment and then the girl I had been talking to got mad about it. Needless to say, she kept sending me a bunch of mixed signals, I got mad, and we stopped talking all together. Give yourself time to get over your ex before starting a new fling, it'll just get messy. This guy deserves better than being your rebound and dealing with your hot-and-cold feelings about moving on to him. Letting him know you just want a friendship right now is better than trying to take things further and it blowing up in both your faces.

    • I'm thinking of letting him know the next time I see him that I'm not looking for a relationship at the moment and that it's got nothing to do with him whatsoever. Hopefully he won't take it the wrong way..

Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 1

  • New relationships are the best method of getting over old relationships, I suggest you go for it


What Girls Said 1

  • You need time to forget about your ex. I had to have time to before a new relationship no rush is happening

    • Yeah, I have tried moving on before after just a few weeks and it made me think about my old ex much more. It usually doesn't work very well..

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