Should I break up with him? Is he just not that into me?

Dating a guy I met online for about 2 months. We meet about once per week or 2 weeks as we are both pretty busy. My schedule will lighten up a bit next week.

This is the longest time I've dated someone, so I am unsure of my feelings. I should add I am also waiting for marriage to have sex (personal and religious reasons), and I told him this a couple of weeks into dating him. (More on this below).

I am considering breaking up with him for the following reasons:
1) He never gave me a clear answer on if he was okay with not having sex with me as I'm waiting for marriage. When I asked, he said he is taking it one day at a time. (We still engage in heavy makeout sessions, however, probably around 2nd base material, and he never pressures me).
2) He is an expat and has a crappy phone plan, only 20 cell minutes. Recently, this has had led to a couple minor disagreements due to misinterpretation of tone on text messages, which could have easily been prevented if we were talking on the phone instead. I've brought this up with him and he is reluctant to switch his plan as it is more expensive. I get the feeling cause he's not sure about us, so why invest in a new phone plan.
3) He still has his profile up online! (Mine is down already - not b/c of him). I can see when he is online, and he goes on at least a few times a week. I realize we haven't had the talk of exclusivity, but shouldn't it be obvious now?
4) Kissing him just doesn't seem totally right. He uses a lot of tongue, and it has improved over time, but a lot of times when I kiss him, I don't really feel physical pleasure but I enjoy his passion. Due to my limited experience, I'm not sure if this is common or not.
5) He seems so complaisant. He will listen attentively when I am talking, but he rarely asks me questions about me. For example, I mentioned I wanted to go for my PhD (I have a MSc) and he said Wow, etc., but never asked me why, or what schools I was looking at, etc.


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What Guys Said 1

  • I think you're nitpicking. Those are all pretty weak reasons to break up with somebody, to be honest.

    1) I wouldn't think this would be a problem unless he disagreed outright.
    2) Or maybe he is just frugal and money-smart?
    3) I don't really approve of that, but I don't feel like it's a huge problem. Probably your best reason out of the 5.
    4) You would break up with a guy cause he's a mediocre kisser? Or cause you don't like his style of kissing?
    5) This is a normal female thing to say. And most guys will react the same way he did, I feel. Finding a guy who isn't like this would be rare in my opinion, it's just a guy thing to not pry deeper like that. He (and I) assume that if you have something you want us to know, you'll say it, not say something related and hope we'll start digging into your personal life.


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