How do I stop myself from feeling completely undatable because of all the rejection I've had?

I'm 24, single, only ever kissed two guys (and those were randoms at a club). I've never been on a date in which in real life a guy has asked me out, I've been on dates from plenty of fish, and have gotten rejected A LOT. I've sent msgs to guys on there to never here from them, or they drop off the face of the earth after one date. I've lowered my standards after much failure, and even guys I'm not attracted to looks and personality wise or sometimes both I went out with just because I needed to "try a different type". One of these guys was kinda cute, but his personality was boring, he had moved from Europe to live with fam here, but after 2 dates he told me we had different values and "To be friends" and we were totally gonna hang after he came back from europe. he barely had any friends etc. either so I don't know I msged him the other day after 6 months of no contact and no reply, and I know he saw my msg.

However, last month I "met" a guy who sold me an electronic device, he overided a bunch of prices, did stuff he wasn't supposed to do... and then wrote his number on the warranty booklet with his full name. Then when I went and googled him found out he has a gf, and then I msged him anyway because I had a question and he saw the message and doesn't even reply!

The other day my friend who has a boyfriend was telling me to go to singles events and she would come with me, and just to pray basically thats how sad my love life is lol

UGH! I don't know what is wrong with me. I feel like not even trying, and its a joke for me to even try. Like why would I have any chance, NO GUY WANTS ME, guys I don't even want don't want, guys I kissed at clubs also ditched me after too. Like I don't deserve to even try because I'm a joke.

I feel super sad and don't know how to deal with it.

Ugh! What the hell is wrong with me? I feel so rejected and just so unworhty


Most Helpful Guy

  • It's not you - it's the way of singles land and plenty of stories like yours

    The successes I can share involve scenes a bit more social than retail & other daily life travels as a single.
    > she had a regular weekday night outing with her gal friends married/single and would either flirt with waiters or a guy... at eateries = dated a pizza water until affair, then married
    > met each other in dance class, hit it off
    > I have some tales of meeting in church/Bible study but 50% find nightmares, the other turned out A-OK
    > I encouraged my buddy after racquetball to go play with a gal on the court that had been stood up (by her gal friend, it turned out) - dating led to marriage
    > Dance halls foster gal & guy groups to be regular friends, then some pair up and it takes off from there
    > if you'll recall all those that initiated a relationship during "school", you'll realize all the possible tangents after "school" similar and able to foster similar. Think social groups, e. g. food bank, chamber of commerce, recreation board, red cross, Bible/book study.. . but mainly anything where the group has more single guys than gals.


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What Guys Said 2

  • You need to slow down and think of it as a game, and don't take anything personally.

    Dating is hard for everyone. If they tell you otherwise they're lying.

    I asked my best friend out, and it took her 4 months to respond to me with a yes. While waiting for her I went on a few other dates with girls I really liked, but felt guilty about my best friend. So I had to stop talking some of those other girls, which was difficult, but I had a personal conflict on the issue. You can't take everything personal, both parties have to be in agreement 100%. If you can't give 100% of yourself to dating someone because you're having thoughts about someone else, it's time to turn down the heat and figure things out first. And sometimes if you're the one on the receiving end of the heat being turned down... you'll take it personally which you shouldn't.

  • Whoa there! Pump your brakes! Calm down, you're lucky you don't have to deal with the heart aches. I'm sure there's someone out there for you and I bet when you find him, he'll he awesome!


What Girls Said 1

  • I don't think this is a nice question, but do you consider yourself attarctive and do you feel like you have a bigtime personality flaw?

    • no to be honest I dont think I'm so ugly or anything. I don't know if I have a personality flaw, I do have friends, find it easy to get new friends but I've struggled more with making a lot guy friends (when I was younger I had more guy friends)