Gents... looks do not count...(to a point)... case study?

Met a handsome model type dude while going out last night. This guy kept saying how he never picks up women, they come to him. Fair enough... he was like a mens health poster. I am also fairly attractive and do gym. So we thought we would go and pick up some girls. Thursday is a bit more silent and we ended up at a bar that was in short... full of guys and a few women. So model boy sat at the bar waiting for some girl I suppose, but I put on my brave face and went to the group of girls and started chatting. The most beautiful of the girls started chatting to me and we went to the bar together. Despite some attempts by every guy and my new pretty boy friend to chat to her... she chatted to me. But due to my poor social skills calibration with women... I got friendshipzoned. She didn't even acknowledge pretty boy as she said he was a douche. Guess what... some thin, nerdy stereotype, that I would actually consider a virgin, came to her with more direct dating game... and got her!! I wanted to high 5 the guy. He pulled the best girl from 2 good looking, gym going, well dressed, party guys. My poor social skills with women, and pretty boys over arrogance cost us ha ha. SOCIAL SKILLS GUYS... its all that counts.


Most Helpful Guy

  • When you're a good looking guy you shouldn't try too hard for any woman. But you do still have to have social skills. Obviously if you're just sitting at the bar not talking to anyone around you, you will look like the anti social and girls (at clubs) care more about your social value than your looks so that's why the skinny dude got the girl. He just knew what to say or maybe he already knew her who knows. Either way if you're a good looking guy you will always have it way easier. I've had girls start making out with me at parties and been approached at clubs by girls before. Just don't try too hard because you're not desperate.

    • Yeah... looks do help. But thing is man... and this is what fascinates me, I do get a few approaches, but I am like the nice shy guy trapped in a body of a cage fighter bad boy look. But I keep getting told that I have the perfect mix of good guy and bad boy. So I go out and test these assumptions. But I am average. Yet my drug addicted, ugly friend, who lives with his parents at 33 years old (I love him to bits tho ha ha) scores all the time. It just doesn't make sense to me.

    • Show All
    • Trust me most girls probably can see right past the lies but he sounds like a passionate guy and girls love that in a guy. And he can probably tell stories really good and make them interesting even though they're not. Everyone likes people like that. But still you should have the advantage if you just get some practice.

    • Yeah... I need the practice. You right about his passion. I suppose that's why I love the dude too. My theory is if you good with the guys, you good with the girls.

Have an opinion?

What Girls Said 1

  • I'm a girl so of course to you, my opinion about what girls want is irrelevant hogwash.

    But I'll share anyway.
    Firstly, beauty is subjective. I know a guy who is easily the most beautiful guy I've ever seen and probably ever will, every girl fawns over him. But to me, and a lot of people I know, "Too perfect" is unattractive. And intimidating. So I wouldn't approach him and wouldn't be into him if he approached me.
    Secondly, everyone has different preferences. Maybe she likes nerds, maybe the guy had a personality she had interest in.
    And like she had said, the guy was a douche, so either he acted like a douche, OR, she assumed he was because he was so attractive (which is another factor to this.)

    Your type seems to think girls can be "persuaded" to going out with a guy and that a few well chosen words can get any guy in the world a date, even if he's 4'2" or 300 pounds or has no nose. That's not true. You are not a car or a piece of furniture and you can't be sold like one. We don't negotiate. We like you or we don't.

    • i'll add that unless the guy does something weird or aggressive, the way he approaches me won't make me like him if I find him ugly or annoying, nor will it makes me dislike him if he seems nice/funny and attractive.

    • Show All
    • Pretty much usually are not. Many of them are drug users.
      But anyway..

    • Most of them are drug users but we all have our demons.

What Guys Said 3

  • In my opinion (though I am younger so girls' mentality may be different) looks get you in the door and personality helps you stay there.

    • Approach gets you in the door, not looks. A model wannabe sitting alone at a pub won't be as successful as an average Joe who actually approaches a girl. A mans "look" is his power in context. Approach means a bit of power... confidence. I won her on my boldness last night, there were other attractive guys and the pretty boy was like a model... no jokes.

    • Show All
    • I agree that personality is a larger part, but there are many girls (in my age group) who would immediately disregard an ugly guy with a great personality because of looks. While approaching gets you to the door you can easily get rejected for being ugly.

    • Look, at your age, many guys don't approach directly, so make sure you get your intention across. Then yes, you will be rejected on looks.., girls also get rejected on looks. But you need to believe 2 things 1) men fortunately get better with age. I was a fucking ugly guy in school and now I'm ok. The choice to work on yourself now will reap rewards later. 2) school is tough. It sets a delusional standard for everyone in terms of social status. When you leave school you still carry that view. Drop it. Everything gets evened out after school, jocks become fat beer drinkers, nerds blossom into successful leaders, some girls I knew turned out to be so gorgeoues.

  • Im sorry the way you pitched that i thought you were going to sell me something.

    • I tried sending a message... looks like I failed apparently. Man, that's genius... two failures in one day?

  • That's what keeps me alive. I've lost a lot of girls, but I don't think I lost them because of my looks. I did have a chance with them and I learned something. But there are perks to being ugly, you know