Hi you guys. I'm dating this guy for almost a month now, and since from the first date he always talked about his ex - we met online and she was the one that recommended him the website we met. As we kept dating I went a lot of times to his house and since the second time, his ex was there.
I was quite surprised to know that she constantly sleeps over there - let's say several days per week. He lives with his parents, plus a brother and a sister and his sister is super BFF with his ex, so when she (the ex) sleeps over, she sleeps in his sisters room.
She (ex) also butted in when we - his whole family - went to lunch on the weekend. They were together for 4 years and they've broken up for one year and a half, but she behaves like she is still his girlfriend in this social sense.
They don't have almost no physical contact - when I'm around - but I feel that he still pays a great deal of attention to her.
He kept talking about her - experiences he had with her - in the first weeks, and I explained to him that I didn't want to hear none of it. Since them he pratically doesn't talk about her, but I feel like I'm constantly in her shadow.
But how I'm going to compete with someone that is not only a memory, but a constant reminder? We've been together for such a short period, and I know that confronting him about it isn't something I feel the right of doing. Yet.
Should I be honest with him, or wait a little more?
TL; DR; My dates ex is a constant presence, always sleeps in his house and won't put herself in her place. Should I talk to him or let it be, until it bothers me to the point of breaking up with him? :[
Most Helpful Guy
I think you should have a discussion with him about this because I don't see how you two can develop a strong relationship with this ex constantly around you both and if she hasn't directly caused any problems yet, she may well do so in the future, so watch out for that.
I do have to ask you a question. Why get involved with someone who is clearly isn't over his ex? He went out with you on a date and all he did was speak about his ex? I'm sorry but I have never gone on a date with a new woman in life and spoken about my ex. He's clearly not over her and with her constantly in his presence there is an avenue for infidelity here.
Nip this in the bud before it becomes a mess is what I would advise you.2