Guy with trust issues - any chance to create a connection?

hello guys, I would really appreciate your advice on this one.
I really like a guy and made it clear I liked him (I approached him) - we met a few times, we got a bit intimate and touchy but didn't have sex; then he told me that I should find a better man, that's he's not worthy and he insisted that I didn't like him, that I only wanted him because I felt lonely (not true, I value his talent, his energy, his looks, his personality etc. but he didn't give me the chance to show him all of this).

He once asked how many guys I have been with, he would ask things like ''how can I know for sure that this lips I'm kissing are mine and only mine'' or even 'I'm a terrible person. If another man laid a finger on you, I would strangle him''.

I know from a mutual friend that his long term girlfriend has left him for his closest friend, so no doubt he has trust issues.

We've never been on an actual date, we only meet from time to time because we bump into each other when attending concerts. We once made plans to see each other in the evening, he later changed his mind and canceled. He never replied to my texts. Last time I bumped into him at a concert, he ignored me for about 30 min. I caught his eye staring at me from a distance a few times, he then came and he hugged me, kissed me on the cheeks and left.

I backed off completely and he hasn't reached out in more than a month.

Usually I know that men prefer the girls they have to pursue. I think he might like me but maybe not enough to invest?

So I was wondering, do you guys think he's not that into me and it's better to let him go, or is there anything I could do to create a bond? If I knew for sure he didn't like me enough, I would try to move on, but maybe is there anything I could do to make him consider giving it a try?

I'll probably see him in 2 weeks at a concert, so I'm not sure if I should avoid him, if I should go say hello, or maybe let him approach?

Thank you in advance

I forgot to mention he is 28 years old (not sure if it matters)


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What Girls Said 1

  • No offence but when guys are crazily and totally into you they make it
    well and truly KNOWN.

    • thank you for your answer. I know he isn't totally into me but he didn't get to know me well enough. and I was just wondering if there was anything I could do to make him want to know me

    • Show All
    • yes, you are right, some things are plain obvious but we overlook them because we don't want them to be real. than you again :)

    • If MUTUAL INTEREST in one another doesn't exist, failure is inevitable.
      I personally am a single serial dater who just likes having fun, gets bored
      easily and is always moving forward. I tell ALL men this about myself from
      jump, which, despite my honesty, still brings MUCH drama when I exit.

      Peace xo

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