Ladies; Need your help to win her back?

Hi Ladies,

I seriously need you to win a girl back. I like her so much.

Here's our story: I'm a normal 25 years old with good job, and then came this new employee who is 22 and with whom it clicked. At first I didn't really pay attention to her but with time I got to know her and felt for her.

I have been asking some girl colleagues on her preferences etc in order to win her heart, I really want to be the perfect gentleman for her. One time I decided to take a step forward and told her about my feelings, and she told me she felt the same way for me and accepted a date invitation which went great and ended up well, to show respect to her I shacked her hand when I drove her back home and she told the girls she really loved the gesture.

However, the issue is that people gossip about us a lot, which put her on pressure as a new employee and told me that she's embarrassed on a daily basis, so we took a step back, I did it for her.

Here is what to know about her: She's very gorgeous with a tight body, she is the girl that any man can notice when she walks in, but I liked her personality rather than her looks, she's fun.

What she likes about me: my looks, intelligence, style and loves my cooking, she literally eats all my food because she love it every time I bring it to work.

What I like about her: personality, fun, openmind, sometimes she says silly random stuff but I find that so cute.

I want to get her back, I don't really care about the gossip in our office, it means for me that people envy us. And the idea of her speaking to other men who look at her only for her body annoys me since I respect her so much, in fact I never got physical with her, only handshaking.

Pls girls, help me out, how can I win her back? :( please reach me out if you need more details that would help.


Updates: today was a good day, she sat next to me all morning and she was leaning towards my side interested in what I do at work. At some point of time when no one is seeing I gave her a little rose (that I think she put in her purse).

Then afterwards whenever I eat something she comes and get some of it, and sometimes I see her looking at me.

In the afternoon she went back to normal, she kept her distance and we didn't talk at all, only when I was having some chips and asked me for some.


Most Helpful Girl

  • First of all you should seriously learn the definition of discretion. You two work at the same place so of course people are going to gossip if you are making it openly aware that you two are romantically involved.

    I say in order to gain back at least a sliver of hope as far as you two getting together I would reach out to her PRIVATELY and express how you regret how you went about connecting with her on a romantic level. That this time around that you would like to do it more privately so that you two can avoid unwanted attention.

    Express to her that you two should possibly come up with a set of rules that you must not break while at work. For instance directly interacting with her at work for reasons other than work. Don't talk and joke around with her that draws attention. If it's not about work then wait until you two are off then talk about it. As a matter of fact you two should keep interaction at work to a bare minimum. Avoid each other like the plague if you two do decide to date.

    It is all about DISCRETION. Keep it totally and completely discreet.

    • Lesson learned... Trust me it is our fault both. We brought attention on us. However I don't want the gossip to affect her view on me. Check my comment on ObviousEnigmas' comment to see some details.

    • Show All
    • True... People are so stupid damn. Well I guess I won't be feeding her next lunch... :\

    • check my update

Have an opinion?

What Girls Said 2

  • I think you should just text her about your feelings for her and that you don't care about the things people say. If I would be her, I would love to hear that :)

    • But she's not you. I think it would put even more distance between them if he did that. That would be acting impulsively. Being fueled by his emotions. In a situation like this you need to be level headed and rational. If he wants her he's going to have to use discretion.

    • Show All
    • I agree with killertaco What do you think of the situation explained in my last comment?

    • check my update

  • Is there any other reason why you two split up? Additionally, what was the gossip about that made her have to step back? I would put myself in her shoes before I started asking her out again.
    If the problem was just that she is a pressured new employee, waiting a few months before asking her out again would probably be in your best interest. By that time she will probably feel a lot more secure at her job and won't worry as much what people think of her.
    If she ends up going out with another person before then, then she probably didn't want to date you and is just trying to be polite about it.
    I hope this helps :) ! Wish I had more information though

    • The gossip was just about the two of us going out etc... Some people even big it up and say we slept... It's our fault in general since she tell the girls about us and I ask the girls about how to behave so its both our fault :/ she said she likes me and she wasn't pretending as she shared her feelings etc. I think many men contact her cuz she's gorgeous but I guess I have a unique view about her. She plays hard to get by the way (doesn't call or text first).

What Guys Said 1

  • I would of told her this: I don't really care about the gossip in our office, it means for me that people envy us. Then proceed to tell her that it's ok and normal to feel embarrassed to receiving so much attention, over time the attention will die down as peoples interest will shift to something else. This is office politics, people gossip, talk smack about others and comes with working in an office. If both of you really like each other, keep it on the down low in the office and engage each other outside of the office especially if she's embarrassed. Now if your standing back means you broke up with her, then I would recommend Relationship Rewind, you can Google it. I would discuss it with her in private, drop her a note indirectly as not to arouse suspicion or whispers.

    • There was no relationship yet man. We just began seeing each other and after our first date people started talking about u we don't even know how they knew we went out like suddenly one girl told her about how it went... So she was like wtf and told me why I'm doing advertising of it while I seriously told no one about the date...

    • Well in that case caution yourself that she may like to create drama regardless of the positives. Another take on this could be someone form the office saw you guys together, or she told someone about it, doesn't want to take responsibility for her actions so she projects it onto you.

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