I like him again but.. I truly do like him?

Alright so let me just start by saying I have a problem where when I get too close to people I push them away in fear of getting to close. Well this fear screwed up my relationship with a guy I liked since march. We both liked each other and all was well until August when I called and told him I don't want to go any further in this "relationship". My best friend is still his best friend and she told me he still hasn't gotten over me yet. And I still like him. I haven't liked anyone since I called it off with him. Just I told my friend and she won't believe me she told me I would have to prove to both him and her that I really want this to go through. And yes I really to because I really like the guy and I don't blame her for saying that. And she says this time it will definitely be a long process because he is trying to protect his heart which I totally understand. Now my question is what can i do to ease this process? I really want to be with him again. haven't been this sure in a while. So what can I do to ease this process?


Most Helpful Girl

  • you're gonna have to do something big to win his trust again. there is no easy way out, sorry. but your friend is absolutely correct. ease yourself gently into his life again. do not be too demanding, do not push too hard. it will seriously take a long time. you must open your heart up to him completely and let him see that you are sincere and your affections for him are indeed real. the time you spend on this will be worth it. tell him you want to start over, a fresh clean state, and this time, truly get to know each other first. talk to each other and stuff. understanding is very important in a relationship


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  • First off, are you positive your friend doesn't have any feelings for this guy? I have a lot of male friends, but certain times when my female friends want to contact them I either think "yeah go for it!" or get defensive because I'm scared they'll somehow hurt my friend, and if I'm completely honest, even the ones I know I would never want to be with him I still have some sort of feeling like "ah, if only I could like you in that way".

    If you're sure she's just being protective, just try to hang out with them at the same time. Don't flirt with him, just act the way you normally do with your friend--since their friends you should be able to mesh up. If it goes well, there's no reason you can't talk to him one on one and say something like "hey, that was fun! we should... xyz". Just ease into it. I don't know how old you are but assumed you can drive, maybe you can end up in a date like setting, as friends, and it can progress. Just go really slow until you have felt him out and have established you aren't trying to see anyone else and thus are serious about his feelings and your own.

    • the girl is dating a guy there year anniversary is like next month. She is also dating my best guy friend so im sure she does not like him. Thanks for the advice though :)

  • Nothing much to do.