So I ended up messaging the sister of a girl I've been seeing off OkCupid for the past few months and the girl found out today, what should I do?

First off, I'd like to clarify that I am not in a relationship so I'm not cheating on her but there's this one girl I met off OkCupid who I had 4 dates with over the span of 3 months and we talk every now and then but I feel like it's going nowhere. She said she's been busy with her new job but basically I'm always the one reaching out to her and she makes no attempt to reach out to me. She will respond to my texts though.

I also saw her active on the dating site i met her off of more than she reaches out to me so I'm keeping my options open. Anyways, I message a girl today who turned out to be her sister. So an hour ago I asked the girl I'd been seeing what she's doing for new years and she said for new years tonight, she's going to her sisters that I messaged off okcupid earlier today and then said lollolol. Doesn't sound like she's pissed about it but I still don't know what to say back to her.

I've been meaning to ask the girl I've been seeing why she hasn't been texting me at all but I'm trying to do it in a way where it doesn't sound clingy or nagging and because this is through texting, it may not translate in the way I want to. On a side note, I've been having that issue a lot. I'll meet a girl off those sites and then after 2-4 dates, they flake and I never hear from them. It kinda worries me.


Most Helpful Girl

  • I would leave her be. If she wanted to get to know you more she would have texted something. Then again I always wait for the guy to message first when texting just to see if he initiates at all. However if you have been texting a the time and she never does then just stop talking to her. If her sister asks anything about you guys or if you have feelings or whatever don't even message back give none of them the satisfaction..

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    • Yeah, well what's shitty is this tends to happen me a lot and I don't know what the problem is. A lot of times, I'll start dating a girl and then she'll initiate texting for awhile but then at a point after date 3 or 4, it's like I'm giving 100% effort with little to no effort from the other person. And I have to text once every few days so I don't appear clingy or eager.

      It's like I don't know if I'm doing too much or too little or if I have some big personality flaw or issue that I don't realize that turns them off. I'm not trying to say I'm perfect by any means at all and blame women, but it when it happens so frequently, it scares me and makes me think I'm gonna fuck up one way or the other.

    • Right, well everyone is different, but what it looks like to me is you deserve someone who will give an equal amount of effort in relationships. Well dating in your case since you said you just went on a few date. I have never dated anyone through online websites but maybe you should try to socialize around and meet somebody in person. If it keeps happening to you through online dating try something different. Online people probably decide they don't like someone the minute they meet and just never text back because they don't care or found someone different. Try being friends with someone in person you might have a different experience and may be able to find someone with equal efforts.

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What Girls Said 1

  • Don't mess with sisters.

    • Yeah once I realized it was her sister, I ended it there. But the point is, were still talking even though were not in a relationship, and she knew that I messaged someone else.

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    • You deserve a answer.

    • Yeah so I texted her saying I didn't know and she's like I'm in one of her pictures, that's so funny. Makes me wonder if she likes that better almost. Thinking I'm keeping my options open and making myself a challenge. It's a shame how that's the way it works.

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