Why are we going round in circles? What to do?

Met a guy online via a friend. We flirted for months and he'd call almost every day. We clicked and would laugh a lot. I was an idiot and put off dates due to my insecurities. We both started getting head fuc*ed because of the odd situation so we'd both get jealous and we'd fall out and not talk. One would always contact the other out of the blue, we'd agree just friends now because we fall out when it turns romantic. We'd eventually start flirting again without realizing and start chatting about sexual stuff we like!! It's gone on over 4 months now and we've gone round in circles at least 6 times! Why can't we chat simply as friends? Because i'm clearly not confident enough in myself to have a relationship just yet... i'm in therapy due to an abusive ex... but I can't just cut him out of my life. What do we do? He'll meet a new girl at some point and it will hurt me a lot even though i'm not ready for a bf yet.


Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 1

  • Give him a shot? Seriously if you're afraid of losing him than give him a shot. I know it can be hard to move on but it will be better in the long run.

    • Thanks but I have zero confidence, i'd only mess it up. You can't be happy with someone til you're happy with yourself. Anyway he said he's had enough a few days ago because i called him a player. . then we didn't chat. He ignored me until i said we should just be friends because we fall out when we chat flirting. He said it sounds like a sensible idea :(

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    • But he doesn't want me anymore? He's agreed friends :(

    • Oh please he only agreed to be friends because you suggested it. If you jumped him to have rough sex he'd probably go for it (this was a expression please don't try this.) If you said you were wrong and want to try dating he would say yes be confident if you're going to try any way then give it your best.

What Girls Said 1

  • Wow!
    You both have some issues.
    From what you said I don't think he will exactly leave you.
    Yeah there's some risk, but that's a natural thing.
    You're rebounding.
    I wouldn't increase the relationship just because he might fly.
    Right now you have to concentrate on loving yourself again.
    Keep in touch with him, follow your heart by using your head.