What should I say to this?

My text:
It is harsh. It is selfish. I will not choose one over another. By giving me an ultimatum to help save the relationship, that's not how it works. If you cared enough, you would understand. It's not that she's not willing to let me go, it's not about the age or if you can see me or not. That plan was a disaster from the get go, it wouldn't have made a difference and it might have made things worse. Right now I am choosing myself. I will let you go, even though it will be really hard for me because I love you beyond words. But also because if I did act on what you told me to do earlier, it would kill her. She has feelings too. I don't want to hurt either of you. I am thinking about her because she's also fragile, I can't do that to her. I will always love you, I'm letting go because it's hurting you. There will be no one on this planet that can make me feel like you do. I don't want to hurt you. I don't want you to always have to wait. She has her issues, okay. I am choosing myself. I am willing but I believe that is not the way to fix things. Hopefully sometime in the far future we can rekindle this flame. When time is right. It's going to hurt like hell, but I think it's best.

His response:

i think you're right, now that i look at it closely. i should love you enough to go through this tough time with you. and you know how much I love you. but your mom makes me feel lime im worthless and a piece of shit, then she says she likes me. its not you that im running away from, its your mom.
i love you enough to handle her but she has a grip on you that will not let you see me. all im trying to do is brake that grip. if you want me to stay and tough it out with you i will do it because you are my life. it just hurts.

I need a few ideas and facts for my response. I don't want to end it if he's willing to stick through but he should have done that in the first place instead of me telling him.
The her and she I am referring to is my mother.


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What Guys Said 2

  • Why is your mum stopping you from seeing him?

    • Because he has issues with prescription drugs and he takes more than he should, I firmly said if he continues to take them. It's over. On our first date he abused them, I gave him a chance to redeem himself and it's been two months and he did it again. I'm not sure if I can give another chance because that'll make me look weak. My mom wants me to stop seeing him because she thinks I deserve better and all this stress is unnecessary.

    • That's a really dark place to be, but you are doing the right thing.

      You need to tell him it's up to him to change. If he can change and prove it then you may be able to love him again. If not it will never work.

      Most likely he won't change, but actually breaking up and wanting you back may give him the motivation you need. You can still be friends of course.

      Well done for seeing the light.

  • You texted this? What carrier/phone do you have? Was there not a text limit?

    • We use whatsapp, because my mom was reading my messages through iMessage.

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