He's 18 years older than me, what will I miss out on?

Okay so I'm talking to a guy 18 years older than me. I'm 18 he's 36. Anyway, most people I talk to say NO!, that's its so big of and age gap. They say I'll miss out on things. LIKE WHAT? What am I going to miss out on? I don't get it! So, with this 18 year difference what would I miss out on?


Most Helpful Girl

  • I think what people are meaning by "You'll miss out on things" is like missing out on being out in the dating world, and getting the chance to just be young and free. I guess they assume that if he is 36, he is most likely looking for someone to settle down with and get married, something serious, and they don't want you to miss out on your young adult life by being married too early or something like that. But I guess if this guy isn't looking for something too serious then go for it. Don't worry about what people say about a big age gap. Age is just a number, they are not the ones that are dating the older person, it's you, it's your life. Just be careful though, that he is not a guy that is just looking to hook up with some younger girls then dump you right away. Good Luck! :)

    • He already knows that I plan to wait for marriage.

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What Guys Said 2

  • It's the political correct thing to say " OMG NO! You are missing out on Blah blah blah". True is you aren't missing out on anything. If you like older men just go for it. Fuck what others think.

    • Right!! I like him, he likes me. I don't get what the hell I would be missing out on anyway! And it's not that I have. Preference for older men. It's i like who he is. We get along.

  • you'll miss out nothing. you're both legal so age difference is not a problem


What Girls Said 2

  • "You'll miss out on..." is a phrase people use to describe what happens when we choose something other than to be our authentic self. Altho, life is about choices, and rightfully they be ours to make. Many things cause all of us to miss out on something and its a sacrifice we all make in hopes of attaining something better in search of true happiness. I think your friends assume that you'll miss out on your youth in choosing to get involved with this older man. Yet what do they know? Its possible he saves you from a far worse experience you 'could' have otherwise. Its hard to say. Just because older men are mature and more readily able to commit as well as start a family (if haven't already) isn't necessarily a bad thing. Truthfully, you'd only be missing out on that which you choose not to experience anyway. And its your right to do so! Nothing wrong with that. Think of all the young adults who have "missed out on" their youth just by choosing to have children at such a young age... think that will really be something they'll regret someday (having their children)? I highly doubt it! Possibly some may but very few do! Sure one could speculate what their life might have been like had they not become parents but would most likely conclude what they gained in doing so far outweighs the sacrifice they made. Bottom line is to forget what people say and think for yourself! Your soul knows the life you are supposed to live and I believe the universe will present us the opportunities in which to lead it. Its up to us (and us only) to choose what experiences we shall have. When we're older and reflect on how we lived our life, I believe we'll regret most the things we didn't do much more than the things we did! ;)

    • Its true that nothing lasts forever. Yet when I think about it some of the worlds best, healthy, LONG-LASTING relationships were between couples who had a considerable age gap. To name a few... Wiki Susan Sarandon (68) & Tim Robbins (56) relationship lasted 23years, Celine Dion (46) & Rene Angelil (73) are still together after 18years (at least), Mariah Carey (44) and Nick Cannon (34) relationship lasted 11 years, Tina Turner (75) and Erwin Bach (57) have been together 27years, Robin Wright (48) and Ben Foster (34) have been together 14years, Joan Collins (81) and Percy Gibson (49) have been in a relationship for 16+years and last but not least Demi Moore (45) and Ashton Kutcher (30) relationship lasted 11 years. Id say such is pretty good odds for Hollywood! ;)

  • Older guys often try to control a mich younger partber and prevent her from deciding what her real interests and personality are. A 36 year old will not want to hang out with your friends, as well, and may try to isolate you from them. He may try to control your taste in music, movies, books, TV shows. He may want to pick your career path. This all is MUCH more likely than a guy closer to your own age.

    • I know more than one girl who had this happen. One of the guys ended up being very abusive. It's not a guarantee, though. Just proceed cautiously.

    • We already work in the same career. I don't have any friends. Legit. I go to work and go home. I like him.

    • Ya, just move slowly and see how it goes.