Dating site dilemma?

So I'm on a dating site for the first time in a while, and I realize that guys are soooo flaky, at least in my area. I'm sure women are too, but why do I have guys writing me these big long emails and when I respond and I'm friendly they disappear. It's not like I'm a psycho asking for their seed. It's regular introductions and then bam, they disappear. Why do guys go out of their way to talk to a woman just to flake a few messages in?


Most Helpful Guy

  • I am on dating sites. My sister actually married a guy last June that she met on POF a few years ago. But she said, for women, 75% of the emails she got were either A) married guys looking for sex, B) single guys only looking for sex C) guys way too young D) black guys (we are white). This is pretty much what I have heard from the women I have dated. So they need to weed through all of those to find guy like me who are gentlemen and really sincere. Basically guys that do that are only out for sex and don't want to put any time in. They blanket email people and see who responds willing to have sex. then they don't bother with anyone who replies normally.
    You just need to keep at it and trust your gut. I have had everywhere from first date sex that we never actually went on a date, after 5 days of super deep long (2-4 hrs texting or more each night) she invited me over for sex. but by that time we are like on date 4 or more... all the way to a woman that wouldn't even tell me where she lived until date 4. I completely understood that. Always meet him someplace until your comfortable.
    just keep at it.

    • It's true. I just wanted to understand the reasoning behind it but I'm pretty sure it's because guys like that are always going after the bigger better deal and as soon as a girl even slightly prettier than I write them back they forget about me. It's okay, it lets me know they aren't worth my time. I just didn't get why they put all this effort into reading my profile and then writing me to just disappear after "what are you up to today?"

    • Like I say, those guys are just looking for sex. So if your reply isn't something geared toward "how about a dick pick" they will move along...
      Make sure if you email someone first you do more then just "HI' or "Hi There" I put right in my profile that if I get that kind of message I just delete it. If a woman can't put any effort into it then I assume she is just emailing a bunch of guys. I went through a few months where I only "talked" with women that approached me first. I am jealous of women... you get chased... I would love to have a woman do that to me. But most of the ones that did, I would never date... not that I am a model by any means but I am not THAT bad. Also put something about yourself in you profile. I don't bother with the women that just put a sentence or two. I probably put way too much but it is all stuff that I want them to be ok with or I would'nt want to date them anyway...

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What Guys Said 0

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What Girls Said 1

  • Most guys want flirty, brief, direct responses about what you will do for them. The rare nice, decent guys who want to get to know you, are only a few.

    • I guess but then why don't they write ho's who reveal all their goodies?

    • They won't get many responses with that.

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