Why won't he break up with me if he is so mad?

Last week I was really emotional and said some hurtful things to my bf because he didn't call me when he said he would. I immediately felt awful and appologized to him with text and voice mail. He never answered texted him a couple more times heard from him 4 days later saying he needs time to think about stuff. Well my grandma is passing away so I need him and I texted him yesterday 4 days later telling him and asking if he could give me a second chance he said he didn't know. I asked him if we could talk and he said he didn't really want to. I noticed his ex is his #1 on snap chat. he's acting like he wants to end things but why won't he? What's going on? I miss him and love him so much.


Most Helpful Guy

  • I don't have enough information to draw a clear conclusion because you didn't say what you said to him specifically. Unfortunately though it seems like you're being a little selfish. You apparently hurt him and you aren't giving him time to figure things out because you feel you 'need' him. I also don't know what sort of commitment you two had and if it was ended.

    • I said that he didn't care and that he couldn't just put me on the back burner after we had sex. It wasn't ended. We dated for 5 months everything seemed fine till this Ik i can get a bit jealous

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    • Then how do I fix it and let him know i do love him and care about him. I screwed up i was emotional and tired and just lost my virginity and started a new bc... I just don't want to lose him I love him

    • @Anon I wasn't aware you had just lost your virginity. That complicates it a little. If he was also a virgin it wouldn't change much but if he wasn't I think he should probably be a little more understanding. It doesn't make what you did right necessarily but at least it makes more sense. If you felt like he didn't care about you that's one thing but to tell him he doesn't is entirely different.

      I would tell him that you were upset and that you didn't mean what you said. We all make mistakes. Offer him space to figure things out. But make it clear that you still consider the two of you together and that you are going to continue being that way until he tells you otherwise (or if he starts ignoring you altogether which happens occasionally). It isn't a guarantee but it's a good start. I hope things don't get weird with his ex though.

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What Guys Said 2

  • Tread very carefully - he may need time to think, but sometimes people can let things drag on even when they want out. Other times there is a strange transition period - breaking apart is usually never clean (people have a hard time to be decisive in complicated situations)

    You did what you could, you're not powerless - the choice to wait for him or leave is yours, but remember that waiting serves him no obligation to necessarily stay.

    • I'm so frusterated cause he needs to step up and get over it or just break up. I don't want to break up with him cause I want to work things out but it doesn't even seem like he wants to so im really confused to why he's hanging on.

    • I've been in a few relationships where everything in your head tells you they should, but yet they don't. Every time though it eventually happens - being caught in this stasis until it does is only going to hurt more.

  • Couples fight and get emotional.

    He's being a baby.


What Girls Said 1

  • My ex said similar just before he 'decided to let me go'
    Hope it's different in your case

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