I know I made a bad mistake (everyone does), but don't I deserve forgiveness?

So this guy I'm extremely into, and he's crazy about me, found out about some sexually referenced messages that I discussed with a good friend of his. I've known this guys friend for a few years now and our relationship has always been close (but strictly platonic). Anything we would discuss or talk about was innocent or in a purely joking manner (he also doesn't live in the same city as us). The guy I'm into and myself, have had a thing for each other for awhile but just started getting serious and intimate about 3 months ago but we never officially we're considered a couple or dating. I haven't been sexually explicit with anyone in those months (except the guy I'm into) and so it was a lapse of judgement and mistake on my part to message his friend jokingly. However his good friend has messaged me in that way in the past himself. his friends supplied him with this information and his close friend supplied screenshots of what was said (leaving out things that he said in return), basically throwing me under the bus. He was hurt and upset (which I completely understand) but would not let me explain myself and the situation or how I felt. Accusing me of wanting his friend even after I told him otherwise and that I only truly wanted him and cared about him and would completely stop talking to his friend if it helped our developing relationship. He then completely blocked me out of his life. I've been distraught over losing him and not talking to him because i truly care about this guy and picture a happy loving life with him. I've discussed the situation with a couple girlfriends who have all told me that he was completely out of line and that what I did is something that could be forgiven especially seeing as we weren't "officially" dating. One girlfriend even offered to contact him for me to help me fix the situation. I know this makes me sound like a slut or a bad person, but I'm truly loyal and caring in relationships. It was simply poor judgement. What do I do.


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What Guys Said 1

  • You did the same as the other guy did not knowing he would text by telling the one you care for. Though it a choice to send the messages, it was a mistake to send them him. Yes I would forgive you. Though it requires an open mind to see it the way I do, and not everyone is open minded.


What Girls Said 1

  • I wouldn't forgive that. You made a choice, not a mistake. If you are too busy sexting other guys, why would he want to waste time with you when he can be available to another woman who doesn't send messages like that to other guys, when she has led the one guy to believe he is the one important to her. Learn from it. "Officially dating" or otherwise is irrelevant, I assume you knew he had feelings for you and I can't be wrong in thinking you knew at the time that sending those kinds of messages to another guy was very disrespectful to the guy you were seeing. He values himself enough to not accept that behaviour.

    • @shadowledgend bad choices are mistakes in hindsight lol

    • No, "mistakes" are what people call certain things they've done in order to absolve themselves of responsibility. Is wasn't a mistake, she chose to send those messages and she didn't think how that would make the other guy feel. She is only saying it's a mistake and wanting forgiveness because the guy didn't like what she did, she didn't realize on her own that what she did was hurtful.