Just wants to date for now

I have known this guy for about 3 years and we just recently started dating. he tells me about how he's liked me since he's met me but always thought he didn't have a chance so he never tried anything. we've had sex and when we've talked about our past sexual experiences he got upset because I said he was the 5th guy I've slept with (he's slept with 9 girls) because he wanted to be the first and only one. we also both agreed that we weren't going to date anyone else.

also, his best friend has liked me for over a year and still likes me (I don't like him), and his older brother's friend and I have been friends for 4 years and he's liked me for a long time too (we've had a complicated relationship but we've realized we're just not compatible).

he talks about how his mom loves me and how for the first time, his brother doesn't talk sh*t about the girl he's dating. he says that ever since he's met me he's been jealous when he's seen me with other guys. when I spend the night we always end up talking for hours and we feel so comfortable around each other. he says that it's weird that we're dating because he never thought it would actually happen but he's happy about it.

the only problem is that he says he wants to wait to make it official. that he wants to get to know me really well on a personal level first. I feel like we know each other pretty well and we already act like a couple.

we both haven't really been in a very long term relationship but I would like to try it with him. I feel like he's only half-way committing to me and it's confusing the hell out of me.

does he really want to be in a serious relationship with me?


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  • awww he's in love with you and wants to make sure everything is perfect...

  • The problem is that the two of you have had sex before you had an emotional connection. He is only halfway committing to you because you are only halfway through the process of being a couple. And, guys take a lot longer with the emotional part of becoming a partner.

    Be aware that the reason two people ultimately become a couple is because they can open up to each other on an emotional level and they feel like they are getting the type of response to that from their partner that works for them. Guys do not want to be your boyfriend for all the reasons you list. It does not come from having sex with them, nor is it because they thought you were the cutest, most amazing girl they could never get. They also do not pick girlfriends because their mom likes you, or their brother or because it seems like you get along and act like a couple.

    It is not the best to already be having sex while the guy is trying to figure out if he knows you on a personal level. Just having sex with him is enough to cause some guys not to be able to move on to developing emotions. All you can do is respect his feelings and take it easy, dating, until he feels like he is ready. You should also think about what you need and maybe you should be taking it easier with seeing him or having sex until he has had time to really process his feelings. You should talk to him about that.