My friends think he's using me, but I don't feel like it. What should I do?

I've been talking to this guy for two months almost everyday. He's honestly amazing, I see him sometimes at school and we hug each other in the hall and talk. I know a lot about him and he knows a lot about me. He makes me happy and amazing, a way I haven't felt before.
But my friends don't like him because he's two grades above me and they think he's in it for sex. We've discussed that before and he said he doesn't want to have sex now and that he wouldn't use me, but if things progress later down the line he wants to be intimate.
My friends think he's going to hit it and run. And while I don't think that about him, I still have my fears.


Most Helpful Guy

  • Sweetie, if a guy was trying to use girls for sex he would have moved on much sooner than two months. Him being older does not mean anything and nothing you said brings up any red flags. Is it possible he could use you? Yes it is. But again there don't seem to be any red flags so far. You friend is being paranoid. Its you heart that gets broke if you walk away, not hers.

    Romance is always a risk, if we run from it every time we get scared we will never find the right person for us.

    If you stay with him don't focus on the bad just accept that there are no guarantees in life and do you best to make it work.

    My vote is to give me a fair chance, he never did anything to show he had bad intentions. Good luck :)

    • Thank you so much!!! :) Me and you have the same mind set because I said to her " He hasn't done more than hug me in two months, if he wanted me as a hump and dump it would've already happened." and she said "He's just playing a good guy role so you fall in love and he can sleep with you."
      What she said to didn't seem logical, so thank you :)

    • Your welcome :)

Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 1

  • The only way your going to find out that question is to stay with him longer. If he really cares about you, he'll give you full respect when you both feel ready to be intimate. Also pay attention to his behavior. Usually you'd be able to tell if he's using you or not but from what your saying, he sounds like a nice guy if he's been treating you with care and you feel comfortable with him :3

    • He's really amazing, he talks to me everyday for hours at end and he's the only person I see or think about.

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    • Thank you :)

    • Your welcome! I wish you two the best of luck x3

What Girls Said 1

  • He's a young guy telling you what you want to hear, but he's most probably in it for the sex. I'd think really hard about the worst case scenario before being intimate wih him. If he dumped you right after sex? Or you got pregnant? How would you deal with those scenarios on your own, because you have to understand the consequences and how to handle them if you are going to have sex and it would be very naiive to say "But he said he wouldn't take advantage", guys will say literally anything they need to, to get sex from a girl or woman. You should ask a 30 yr man what he would tell a girl to get sex when he was a young guy, and he'll tell you that he would say anything.

    • You seem very bitter, im sorry for whatever happened to you. Its no secret that guys like guys and guess what girls do to *gasp*. There is no sense wasting your life worrying about what may happen. We could play that game all day. Think about the worst case scenario of leaving your house. What if you get mugged? Hit by a car? What if we get hit by a meteorite? Yes, if there are obvious red flags take them into account. But nothing the girl said indicates in anyway what so ever that the guy is a douche.

      Im 27 and I have not ever lied to a girl to get her into bed. If a girl does not want to sleep with me there is another who does.

      I say give the guy a chance

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    • So someone saying something you don't like constitutes harassment now? If you post any opinion publicly don't be surprised when people sometimes offer a counter argument.

    • You said your opinion, I said mine and then you commented on mine and I acknowleged that but continuing to do so, for whatever reason, maybe you'll think you'll force me to change my mind or argue with you, I don't know but you said what you wanted to, it's pointless to continue commenting just to get a reaction.

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