Does this seem like a normal friendship between a girl and a guy? What do you think of the chances are of somethign more than friends?

So I am friends with this girl who is 4 years older than me, and I've never had a female friend who I became so close with. We met 2.5 years ago, and we started to hang out. Eventually I developed feelings for her and told her that I liked her. But, she told me "your too young for me, we should just be friends.".. So, now I'm 26 and she's 30, and we're both single and best friends with each other.

The thing is, we hang out almost everyday. She will call/text me when she's free and invite me to come over and watch TV at night. We go out together all the time, and it's always just the 2 of us. We go on vacations together, and I sleep over her house sometimes.

Her parents love me and invite me out with the family all the time. Her mom even invited me to her birthday dinner. It feels like I'm the boyfriend, only I'm just a friend.

The things that make it seem strange is when she links arms with me or rests her head on my shoulder, puts her hand on my thigh. Stuff like that is just a little too touchy. It doesn't happen too often though. When i leave, she ALWAYS has to kiss me on the cheek and if i don't, she gets upset.

Also, she'll make me call her when i leave to let her know i got home safe. One time i forgot to call and she freaked out and called me the next day like 15 times! Also, when I'm busy and don't respond right away, she'll freak out and ask, "why are you ignoring me?"

The other day she invited me to dinner but i had plans with another girl. I told her I would call her after my dinner, and i get a text from her during dinner asking me, "are you done yet? do you want to come over?" She thought i was on a date, and she goes and texts me and interrupts!

It goes back and forth between her being really close, then kind of distant. Like she acts strange and doesn't text me back right away, or uses 1 word answers. Other days she'll want to talk all day.

I don't get her at all.


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  • You have to ask yourself if you value the friendship more than the potential relationship. If your heart says that you want to be more than friends, then just tell her that. But know that you could be losing the friendship. There's nothing worse than guys complaining about being stuck in the friend zone. Seriously. Just:

    1. Ask her out, or
    2. Be content with being friends and learn to value that friendship and NOT expect it to lead to a romantic relationship.

    So many guys complain about being "friend zoned." Just do #1 or 2 above, or

    3. Stop becoming friends with women because you apparently don't have the capacity to be friends with someone of the opposite sex who occasionally touches your thigh or puts her head on your shoulder.

    This may sound harsh and I do agree that she's giving you some mixed signals, but I still stand by my recommendations. Lastly, 30 and 26 is NOT a major age difference. If she keeps saying that, it's her way of politely saying that she's not into you.

    Good luck.

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