He was excited about a date and a sleep over and then?

All of the below was done via text message...
He asked me if he could come stay the night with me after having dinner. I said sure. (We have been talking for about 2 months now and this is the 4th date.) Then in one minute later he asked "Is that asking for too much?", I responded with "No, not at all." Another minute later he says "Nevermind". My response "Nevermind? That's a bit odd." No response from him. Next morning... I send a text and say "Hey I was looking forward to dinner and you coming over... yea or nay?" His response "I can't come" (with a frowney face at the end and no explanation.) My response "Ok! Pshaw". I am not a needy person. I can take it or leave it or schedule it at a later time or not. This one baffled me though... what gives here guys? Did he scare himself or what? Last thing I want to get involved with is a flake who plays the enter and withdraw game... should I get out of this now? LOL!

  • Should I run?
    Vote A
  • Should I be patient?
    Vote B
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Most Helpful Guy

  • Communication by text and email is fraught with potential for misreading what other people are thinking. Judge it more by how you both are face to face. It could be that he was hoping for something more enthusiastic than "No, not at all". For example I always wonder if people are being funny with me when they just give simple answers like "Okay" so I always try to embellish. If he feels he is being too pushy then he may be more inclined to take brief replies the wrong way.


Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 4

  • hrm... On this i'd say that guys aren't used to a sure thing. Girls may know they're going to sleep with a guy after a certain date, or decide sometime during the week that this date is the sex date, guys don't usually know.

    I'd say you should have been more coy, there are a million playful replies that wouldn't say no, but wouldn't have came across slutty either. (not that i really think date 4 sex is slutty)

  • Any of a number of possible reasons. He could of backed down because he didn't want to seem like he was pressuring you. He could of lost his nerve. He could have changed his mind. And Bushcrafter is right. Misunderstandings is sure to ensure if plans are not made in person.

  • Good-luck, Saucey1968.

  • You are easy even if you know what you want, cheaper than tissue role.

    • I guess that's your opinion. You must be way insecure with yourself to post something like that. You don't even know me! Jerk!!

    • Show All
    • Tormentarian... fits you well.

    • "You will not get another response from me so go bother someone else!" - Contravening your own policy. Hmm not much to be desired about you at this stage in your life, focus girl focus!

What Girls Said 2

  • If you have better dates waiting in line, then ignore him until he come clean and forgets playing games... which could include a GF backstage.
    Otherwise, this would become a prime topic of my conversations with him, as if a research reporter digging to find the answer.
    Had he always been sexually critiqued to the point of no confidence?
    Was he testing my morals? My attraction to him?
    Inquiring minds need to know!

  • He wanted you to be harder to get and not give him sex right away. When he realized you were easier to sleep with then he thought he lost interest in you.

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