Im a normal woman fairly attractive yet I can't find a serious man?

i dont get it, I am a confident, independent, funny, sassy, feisty amerian Italian woman and im 61. I act like im 40 but that just me, no pretenses. I've been told I look a lot younger but im me and whoever doesn't like it oh well.

I have a very strong personality. I have plenty of dates but none that go beyond the first. all these guys say how much they like me and of course the ultimate motive is to get me in bed... which I don't do on the first date period.

I am a cougar as well but will not date men younger than 45. I get hit on by all ages, marital status not a problem for them, but honestly it will get me nowhere.

im honest and open and tell it like it is. why do you guys have to say u will call, say you had a great time, kiss me pretty passionately and then BAMMMMM nothing? is this a game or what... I can get some anytime I want but that's not what im after.

I want to have a real relationship with a man. I was married 36 years to the same man, never cheated and now widowed 6 years. boy, they sure as hell don't make men like they used to.

is it possible I intimidate men? I just don't get it!

so damn frustrated... in new jersey.



Most Helpful Guy

  • i think its because there's no market for confident, independent, funny, sassy, feisty amerian Italian 61 y. o. s

    • lol, well I appreciate your opinion but definitely beg to differ with it. there is a market for strong, confident, independent women of any age, the problem is men can't handle us lol... and don't want to commit...

    • well why dont 60 y. o. men want to commit?

    • Because like somebody just mentioned they could be out of a bad relationship they want to play the field. But I did learn one thing. I'm not saying I'm looking for a relationship anymore. I'm not looking for marriage I'm looking for a for someone to go out and have fun do things, travel, weekend getaways. But I wanted to be consistent and I want to be the only 1 I'm not a side chick. Thanks for everybody's opinion. Just trying to figure out the male psyche and you guys they were complicated lmao

Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 1

  • If I was to theorise in a very general way I'd say that a lot of guys who've got to their 50s and later and who are dating have been through relationships and come out the other side. They've probably missed the benefits of being single and are taking some time to enjoy them again before they are too old to. If I was to find myself single again I don't think I'd be rushing back into anything.


What Girls Said 1

  • I think being a cougar narrows the field a bit, just because so many guys go for younger women. But there are guys out there who are very into older women! Maybe open up the dating pool to guys your age and possibly a little older? There are a lot of good guys out there, but I know it's frustrating trying to find them; at any age! Don't give up! I am sure he's out there.

    • thanks margarita, it definitely widens the field lol, not narrow it but regardless of age, I can't find a guy that's serious. im not talking about marriage right away, I want to have fun but be exclusive with one man. I've dated men from 45 to 63 and they are all the same. im not looking for love, right now just enjoying myself but still miss the companionship and closeness of a man.

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