Should I not be myself to get girls?

I have noticed girls like stereotypes, they like guys who fill a role or a place in society
whether they like artsy kids, hipsters, athletes, frat boys etc

I really am myself, i am like unidentifiable, girls just look at me like "what is he?"

i dont fit a mold, and girls my age want a "type"

so should i just become a "type" because being myself isn't working...


Most Helpful Girl

  • strive to be the best version of yourself. the richest rewards come that way, even if it takes longer. trying to fit a type adds internal stress, at least for me it did...

    • yeah i think i should just continue on bettering myself...
      it just sucks that i have no one here to support me...

    • i would not worry so much about lack of support. it implies loneliness, which sends out a negative vibe, even if you don't notice or act that way

Have an opinion?

What Girls Said 3

  • No. You should be working on continuing to be you. Period. Don't change to please society. If you're gonna change, do it for yourself. If a girl wants you to change who you aRe then she's not the one. You'll know when you've got the right girl, because she'll like you just the way you are.

    • ... I don't know if i am actually likable
      i dont fit into what girls like, well at least girls my age
      and then girls older than me dont take me seriously or say "oh you are baby :)"
      it just sucks... i dont really have a friend group either

    • Show All
    • thank you sensei lol!

    • Lol no problem.

  • you can't pretend to be someone else forever, plus wouldn't it feel far more satisfying know that whoever you are with likes you for who you really are?

    • but no one likes me!
      i feel all alone at university, my gf cheated on me, and i am miles away from my family

      I just want to have friends, be part of a group, have a gf

      its not easy being honest/true self 100% of the time

    • You need to start thinking this: "everyone loves me! everyone likes me!" If you think no one likes you, of course no one will like you. I am sorry your girlfriend cheated on you, sounds like emotional torment... but if she doesn't appreciate you, someone else will will appreciate you. She is only ONE person, not the whole world. Remember that.

      Also, love your true self. Don't hate yourself just because someone else was mean to you. It is like punishing yourself for someone else's mistake, her opinion of you doesn't have to be your reality.

    • yeah i have been kind of down lately...
      i need to change my attitude maybe!

  • Each person is unique and we have our own quality as a person. There must be someone who will find you amazing the way you are. No need to change yourself into somebody else :)

    • I don't know, i just feel lame
      i am very solitary at my university, everyones so different from what i am used to
      and the girls don't like me at all!

      I don't know i didn't have these problems in the past
      it just seems like the kids who fit a certain type always have a friend group, always have girls...

What Guys Said 4

  • Absolutely. If your current strategy ain't working, find a new one.

    In my experience, you kinda have to ease girls into who you truly are. Dating is a bit of a game, unfortunately. It's not necessarily a big one that you have to focus all of your attention into but, you do have to put a little effort into it.

    Just do your best to be charming and don't good on too tightly when you have a girly on the hook.

    Don't ever let 'em see you sweat but, keep it 100, all the same.

    • thanks for the advice i think thats what i gotta do

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    • thanks for the insight bro!

    • S'what I'm here for.

  • I think as soon as you stop caring about them they will start noticing you. I'm a good example because I don't care anymore and they notice.

  • At university there's thousands of people. Im sure there's a group at there for you. Dont change just to try and fit it, id rather be alone and myself than in a group as someone else.

  • dude... you should ALWAYS be yourself to get girls ;-)