I hate my boyfriend's housemate's girlfriend?

She always spend time at their place and have dinner with my bf and his housemate. The three of them are so close they even laying on bed watching netfix with each other. I can never go to their place and my bf doesn't want her to know about me. When I do have a chance to come over, her bf never have dinner with me. I hate her so much why does she have everything and I have nothing what do I do now?


Most Helpful Girl

  • Sounds like you're jealous.. but thats okay because thats your boyfriend she's laying in bed with lol And thats not okay!! I'd say you should stop being a push-over and let him know that bugs you and your not going to take his crap anymore. Take control of the situation and quite frankly it doesn't even sound like he's your boyfriend based on the way you described him... your bf should want to show you off to every b*tch out there :) He might break up with you if you give him an ultimatum though just an fyi but that might actually be a good thing cause he sounds like a horrible bf anyways.

    • I know about her, but she doesn't know my existence. How fair was that? And his house ate and him already have an agreement not to tell her about me. I feel like he's embarrassed of me.

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What Guys Said 1

What Girls Said 4

  • he doesn't want her to know he has a girlfriend? thats extremely shady, maybe he really likes her even though she's taken because there's no other good reason to hide your existence from her even if you didn't like her and he thought youd cause trouble over nothing (she can know about you without ever having to meet you so whys he so keen to hide it?).

    • I know about her, but she doesn't know my existence. How fair was that? And his house ate and him already have an agreement not to tell her about me. I feel like he's embarrassed of me.

    • Sounds more like he wants her to think he is single so he can poach her from his friend

    • Actually from looking at your other question it sound more like he's embarrassed to be seen with a white girl in front of other Korean people which is racist and an attitude you shouldn't have to put up with

  • Maybe your bf is worrIed that you will make things awkward between them if you go. Have you ever gotten upset at him before because he was close to a female? Or have you gotten upset at other females because they were close to your bf.

    Have you asked him why you can't come over?

    • I can come over only when she's not there, and most of the time she's there. Whenever I'm at their house and she comes over, he always tell me to shut up and don't make any noise and sneak out of the house and we'll go somewhere else because he never want her to know about me. I was never jealous or anything but this unfair situation really piss me off.

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    • www.girlsaskguys.com/.../q1371588-i-have-no-idea-what-i-should-do-right-now

      That's my other post. he said that's the reason... It sounds ridiculous for me though.

    • Sorry to hear that.

      It sounds like a combination of racism and a cultural clash.

      If a guy can't stand up for you in small things how will he stand up for you in bigger things? For me his behaviour is a huge red flag and to save you pain in the long run it would be better if you guys broke up. Here are my reasons:

      a) he won't stand up for you
      b) he let's random people influence your relationship
      c) he acts like he is ashamed of you
      d) his social/cultural circle is racist towards you
      e) the cultural difference is too big

      He is not going to change. He will only get worse and add on more restrictions thus making stress more and eventually causing a break up.

  • I do not think you actually hate her but rather hate the attention your boyfriend gives her.
    To me it is a red flag that your boyfriend doesn't want her to know about you. You shouldn't be a secret to people if they love you. They should be okay with people knowing.
    I think you need to have a conversation with your boyfriend about your relationship.

    • He even have an agreement with his housemate not to let his gf know about me for some odd reason. I feel like he's embarrassed of me and I hate this feelings. Well I know about ehr and she doesn't even jnow i exist how fair epwas that?

    • You're better than that, no girl deserves to be a hidden secret. He shouldn't be ashamed of you. It's a huge red flag that he doesn't want others to know.

  • why does he not want her to know about you?

    • I don't know I have no idea. Seems like he's embarrass about me or something he always try to hide me from others.

    • kick him to the curb you don't need a man that doesn't appreciate you

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