Why is it that men's standards are too high, but no woman should ever settle for less?

Those two things seem very one-sided. I certainly don't think we all want models and will be totally fine with many different women. However many women seem to think they should never settle for less-than-really high expectations when they may not be even close to matching that type of guy they're looking for.


Most Helpful Girl

  • I don't know---I think that there are a lot of men and women who should lower their standards, and there are a lot of men and women who need to have higher standards, and some of it has to do with the areas in which they have high standards and the areas in which they have low standards.

    For example, I see both men and women who have very high standards when it comes to physical appearance. I suppose you can't really help what you're attracted to, but some people seem to have impossibly high standards (and quite a few don't meet those standards themselves). Maybe I just don't get it because I'm attracted to a pretty wide variety of people.

    On the other hand, I see both men and women getting into and staying in relationships with people who treat them poorly. In those cases, I don't think they have high enough standards (or, perhaps, misplaced standards).

    Ultimately, I think people are allowed to have as high of standards as they want, I just don't want to listen to people complaining about a) not finding anyone who meets their super high standards, or b) finding that the people who meet their high standards aren't interested in them (since those people are allowed their own standards, and you might not meet them, sorry).

    If you complain, and people think your standards are too high, there's a good chance they'll suggest that you lower your standards.

    That said, I think women do get a lot more "Don't settle for someone who doesn't treat you right" (and I think men could benefit from more of this, since a lot of men seem to think it's normal in a relationship for the woman to treat them poorly or not give as much to the relationship as he does). But women are also told quite frequently that their standards are too high, and that they're wrong or awful for caring about x, y, or z.


Most Helpful Guy

  • Hey, no need to worry about this.

    Time is women's worst enemy. Whereas it can be an ally for men.

    The girls who have unrealistic expectations now often face greater competition as time goes by and looks fade.

    But men age like wine. Experience, life experience in general is attractive. I'm not there yet, but I feel there's some shift that occurs around the 30 year old mark. Something that has to do with biological clocks.

    • that only works if you have money, otherwise you are in the undesirable batch.

    • Indeed. That's why I said it CAN be an ally for men (as long as they take care of themselves and keep improving). Sadly the same can't be said for women.

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What Girls Said 3

  • I thought it was the other way around. That women have too high standards and no man should ever settle for less.

    • Really? Maybe it's because I'm a man and see it from my own perspective, but I don't ever recall being told not to settle for less. I do agree that many women have too high standards though, but we also get blamed for only wanting to date model-level women.

    • I've noticed that a lot of men who want a model kind of girl are very shallow and have egos the size of Texas. They're also the kind of guys who think it's funny to put down women who have curves. It's my opinion that men shouldn't have to settle for less any more than women do. They deserve better than what they usually get.

    • I totally agree with you.

  • Tbh, I applaud both men AND women who have high standards and
    am one myself.

    ie: Bi serial dater right here :)

  • I think there is a lot of truth in what you say.


What Guys Said 3

  • I don't think anyone should settle. What some people might believe as settling, others may see as a charm. It all differs from person to person.

  • i thought guys were more picky basically..

  • Women have an easier time getting laid, and don't realize how much a guy already lowers his standards for easy sex. If women realized how much a guy already lowers his standards for an easy lay, then a lot of women wouldn't be so full of themselves. Instead you have ugly women still getting fairly attractive guys trying to sleep with them. So these women think a guy that is actually at her same level of attractiveness has unrealistic standards when he approaches her.


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