How do you stop becoming attached too quickly?

I always get way too attached, way too fast when I start seeing a guy which almost always makes me look like a crazy woman and scares him off. How can I stop becoming so attached so fast? It's really frustrating!
Not sure if it makes a difference but I always start getting attached when it gets physical, like after our first kiss


Most Helpful Guy

  • Try to understand yourself first, what you want from life, your personal life goals, once you get clear about this stuff, then you will actually start thinking about whether this guy will be right for me or not, and there won't be too much attachment unless he is the right one for you...

    • That's actually really good advice. Thanks 👍

Most Helpful Girl

  • Try to keep some distance at first. Some privacy. You're still dating, really like each other, but you aren't a family yet, so give him his privacy. Have dates and together time, but let him go home and have his alone time as well. For me the first weeks of seeing a guy, we mostly fuck 80% of our date time, just cause it's so damn fun with someone new. I think everyone would have that if they let the guy choose how to spend the time, and I am the kind of girl that gladly does it. So we have very intimate together time, he goes home and has some alone time. It always worked for me. That doesn't mean you can't call or text him, just don't be there all the time. Send him some love messages, but don't tell him everything you're doing and don't make him tell everything he does. In the first phase of a relationship, I see the two as people who like each other, date each other, fuck each other and think about each other. That is nowhere near a family situation where husband and wife know everything about each other (which often still doesn't work without privacy). Everyone says guys shouldn't want to get ahead of themselves and start fucking after the first date, but I think girls should not get this family ideal in their head from the first date, which is a lot less healthy.

    Oh and remember: doesn't matter how close you get with someone and how many years you've been growing toward each other, you will never become one and the same person. You do not own each other. You are two different people who spend separate lives... together.


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