Should I just give up?

I am a guy~

Now, with that being said. I would like the mighty yahoo answers the above question after you read my dilemma located below.

It starts like this: This girl and I were selected to do a group project. We would talk online for hours flirting, doing that ask any question about the person game (any question was fair game). Things looked good I was about to ask her out (maybe to see a movie, go to a haunted house I don't know w/e). Then things changed, we had to present the group project.

The project went horrible! The group was total garbage thankful I was able to wing the ending of the project(it was a group presentation). I did the conclusion and got 15/5( It was so good the instructor gave 10 extra points).

After the project any time I would talk to her (six attempts in all) she would say she has to go do X, then she has to go do Y. It felt as if she didn't want to talk to me now that the presentation was over.

Still engulfed by her I asked her if she wanted to study for the mid term and call/txt/im me when she wants to. She didn't call back/txt or IMme back(she said she would). What is funny is she ended up doing horrible on the midterm(yes I know I was very happy she failed for her rudeness for not saying she wouldn't be able to study and completely ignoring me).

This is where it flip flops in a way leaving me clueless. After I deleted her from my contact list via cell phone and Yahoo Messenger I get a message saying sorry she hasn't had time to talk to me... But, before this she seen me in the library and asked how did I do on the mid term I told her what I got then went my own way(maybe she could tell I was little upset).

I responded with the IM saying, "I would have talked to her at the library but it would have been awfully awkward". She responded with, "awww why". I said brb( I wasn't going to answer that and I knew her friend told her I was probably going to ask her out). Then she said, " I gotta go I'll IM you tonight."

It is now two days from that "I gotta go I'll contact you tonight." remark and still no contact...

Phew *puts lotion on hands*

So what is your opinion should I just say screw it and cease contact and stop wasting my time?

btw I originally asked this on, before I realized there was a website dedicated to this kinda stuff(brilliant Idea!).

I agree rock, off to the ignore list she goes!


Most Helpful Guy

  • What's your end game? I mean do you want to date her or not? You:

    -"deleted her from my contact list via cell phone and Yahoo Messenger"

    -"told her what I got then went my own way"

    -told her "I would have talked to [you] at the library but it would have been awfully awkward" (& then told her "brb" to avoid answering her "why?" response on IM...

    I'm guessing you never IM'd her back, so she probably thought you ditched her online).

    Then you complain that it's been 2 days since you've heard from her. You just spent the days before that pushing her away! What exactly do you want?


Have an opinion?

What Girls Said 3

  • Don't waste your time anymore. You have done everything you could do to make a date happen, and she just wasn't interested enough to meet you halfway. You tried, that is all you can do.

  • I can't say one way or another what she was thinking because I don't actually know, but I will say that there's a chance that she honestly, genuinely could not get into contact with you. Whether she wanted to or not is an entirely different story but I would guess that she either wasn't able to get online/call/text or had something else that was distracting her from responding. I've had it happen to me a few times where I told myself "okay, I'll respond later, I just need to do this first" and never ended up responding like I'd meant to.

    I don't think it really helped that you avoided telling her the issue. Chances are, the total silence when she'd asked why it would have been awkward to talk to her at the library may have lead her to end the conversation with the promise that she'd contact you later. It makes sense to me to think that she understood that you were upset with her and understood that you thought it would be awkward to talk to her, but didn't really know why or, perhaps, that she knew why but didn't know how to address it until you put it into your own words. Not telling her probably made her think that you're upset enough that you're trying to avoid her which may be why she didn't IM you back. It's possible that instead of being cruel and having you wait by your instant messenger of choice (not trying to say you were, by the way~) she was trying to be merciful by not forcing you to talk to her when she may have thought that you were angry with her to the point of saying "brb" so that you wouldn't have to deal with her.

    tl;dr: Potentially all a series of misunderstandings and (potentially)accidental ostracism.

    I think that you should continue to pursue the girl. Next time you see her, casually ask her to your/her favorite/most anticipated movie/haunted house/activity of choice, and be forward with her. Avoiding questions only usually makes things worse than they need to be- by being honest and not beating around the bush, you'll find out whether or not you should continue after this girl.

  • Do not waste your time anymore on this girl, you don't need to play childish games. You obviously tried to show your interest and all she wants to do is play with your feelings. You can go out and find a girl that knows what she wants. Good luck :)


What Guys Said 2

  • Enjoy the story telling man, but seriously yea she is a waste of time. The whole group thing was a smoke screen. She though she could piggy off of you and you'll do the work for her. Her not speaking to you after is the fact of that, so just brush her off and move on.

  • I faped to this.