They don't matter because in casual sex a lot of the time it is a quick fix situation and so, generally, you're ok with an average looking girl. Also, it is quite often the case that uglier girls are better at sex while pretty girls tend to lie there and give average quality bjs.
They don't matter in relationships because you are primarily looking for a partner... someone to spend time with and hold conversations. In this way, looks aren't in your initial thoughts when deciding what you want out of a relationship.
They do matter negativly because if you are more attractive than they are or than they have dated you are likely to bring up a lot of insecurities. Sometimes this will be obvious and other times it will be through the sort of reactions you get and the assumptions that the "non hot" person makes about the hotter person based on their personalities that they wouldn't make if the hot person weren't so hot.
They do matter positively in relationships because your family and friends tend to be more positive about an attractive mate.
They do matter negatively in relationships because your family and friends may assume they are not faithful, not of good character if they are oddly more attractive than you (i. e ulterior motives.)
They do matter positively in casual sex because you are an ego boost kind of like hooking up with a celebrity. You are seen as higher quality and because they are not going to date you, they feel comfortable overlooking your glaringly negative traits of entitlement, shallowness, etc.
(For guys) looks affect you negativly because outer beauty is viewed as feminine and inner beauty is viewed as masculine (i e a hot ass works for girls and is nice but doesn't do anything for guys, a very strong inner confidence works for guys, but guys don't really trip if there girl "doesn't believe in h
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looks matter to me in the extent that it usually is what draws me to a woman, but i won't date a girl who's personality is questionable. I also won't date a girl if her looks rank above everything else about her. I want my partner to actually be able to grow on me, to the point that the way she looks doesn't really matter to me anymore. Personality is more important than sex, but sex is not unimportant