Got turned down, but might still have a chance?

Hey everyone.

There's this girl at college I really like. It's been two years since I've really liked somebody, but when I met her, something felt right. Anyway, we started talking, and getting to know each other, although not at a deep, personal level. We spent two months like that, just plain talking about stuff.

Last week, around Thursday, I asked her out, but she turned me down. She said that she didn't want me to take it personally, since she thought I was a good, sweet guy. She said she just wasn't in a "dating mood". The weekend passed, and on Monday at college, she came to me and said she wanted to be clear about the other day, and again, she said that she thought about it over the weekend and concluded that she just didn't feel ready to date, and a lot was going on for her. I told her she didn't have to worry about anything, that I understood her feelings and that we could still hang out and be cool. The thing is, she has been really weird all week, barely talking to me. So after all this, I'm not sure about what she might feel towards me. I'd like to think she likes me enough to give me a chance in the future, but her answer and her attitude towards me has mereally confused.

What do you guys think? Any advice is welcome and appreciated!!


Most Helpful Girl

  • Leave her be.

    She isn't interested and you fixing on dating her is only going to ruin what relationship you DO have with her because she's going to take it as you don't respect her desire to not want to be with you. Truth be told, as cold as it is, I wouldn't put it past the girl to just be saying that to spare your feelings because you aren't her type, a lot of us girls do that.

    She doesn't see you romantically I promise you that, just from the heart coming from a girl who's done exactly what this girl has done. If she felt any kind of romantic feelings towards you she would have made it clear.

    • Also her avoiding you is a pretty good indicator that she has no interest, she probably feels awkward about being around you now. Find a girl that is interested in you, don't get hung up on one that clearly isn't.

Most Helpful Guy

  • I honestly hate to say this, but she has no interest in you romantically. You're reading the signs completely wrong, and I know why you think you still have a chance. You still think you have a chance because she came up to you after you asked her out. What she was doing was a nice way of saying "I don't want to date you, and I want you to realize that". If she legitimately meant what she said, she wouldn't be avoiding you at all and trying to get to know you better. She's a very good person because she's trying to avoid leading you on. I'm really do hate saying this and I'm sorry, but there's probably not a chance of you two dating. I would tell you if there was, but there are no signs in your explanation that says otherwise. Her saying that you're a good guy (not necessarily the sweet part, that part is fine) was pretty much saying that you were too nice, and never truly opened up about yourself. When you're not yourself around women, they can't really gauge whether you could be potential partners in the future.


Recommended Questions

Have an opinion?

What Girls Said 2

  • I think that she might feel a little awkward because she probably thinks you like her. Girls hate being Awkward with guys that like theM. But ya know, she might also be busy I mean she did mention to u that a lot was going on. I would just leav the situation alone and go on with life.

  • I think she's merely being cautious around you, not trying to give you any mixed signals that might lead you to think that she's more interested than she is. Or she feels awkward about the whole situation.

    I think you should still be yourself and friendly to her.


What Guys Said 3

  • She probably doesn't know how to act around you knowing now that you have feelings for her. Sorry man but just move on she isn't in to you.

  • No, move on immediately. She might be interested, but her interest level is too low for her to want to date you.

    Find other girls and don't care about how she act toward you from now on. Be cool with her but that it. You said you understood her feeling but that just a lie isn't it? You understood jack shit lol.

    If she decide she want you, she can be the one to come go up and talk about it. You will be the one to give HER a chance. You done all you can for now. The ball is in her court.

    It normal for someone to act differently to you after they know you like them, it fine. Act normal like nothing happen and stay cool. Start looking for other girls.

  • keep talking to her, be natural and wait till she's interested.

    • No, a thousand times no. Talking to her is fine, but let her initiate. Don't wait until she's interested, go see other women.

    • i forgot to mention that.

Recommended myTakes