She asked for my number but is super slow to reply back and apologizes. Is she not that interested?

So, I met a girl about two years ago through a mutual friend at a party. We got along great and danced most of the night. Long story short is that I didn't get her number because she wasn't acting as enthusiastic around me towards the end of the night and when I invited her out she said "we'll see…", so I left it alone.

Fast forward to the present. I ran into her a few weeks ago at the same mutual friend's baby shower, and she was laughing and smiling the whole time we talked. She only stayed for a little bit, but she suggested that we exchanged contacts and asked for my number. I suggested that we get a coffee sometime and she said yes.

I texted her the next day and said that it was nice talking to her. She replied hours later saying sorry for the late reply, that she was busy, and asked how to spell my name since she thought she might've saved it wrong. I answered her question and tried to make small talk but she didn't reply. I texted again two days later inviting her out to get a coffee and she replied within 5 minutes saying "Hey ___. For sure. I'm usually busy at work on Saturdays but if it turns out slow then for sure and I'll let you know". Saturday passes and nothing so I text her the following Tuesday night asking what her schedule was like for this week and she replied the next day "Hey ___! Im so so sorry for not replying…. but I'm working until Saturday and then going out of town until Tuesday morning." I then asked what day worked for her next week. It's been 24 hours and no reply. I'm really confused and am wondering if I should move on since I'm starting to feel like I look desperate. Any advice?


Most Helpful Girl

  • I feel like she would have given you a more definite alternative if she was really interested. Who knows, maybe she'll surprise you and do just that, but yeah I'd move on for now. If she replies, cool, but I'd just leave it to her to set something up if she wants to.


Most Helpful Guy

  • Its pretty clear what's going on here. She's not interested, she is prioritising other things ahead of a simple coffee date with you. Time to move on.

    • Things like this happen all the time. At parties, its very easy to be influenced by alcohol or be 'in the moment'. She said yes because at that point in time she felt good, partly due to you but also partly due to the alcohol and the atmosphere. Take away the etoh and the atmosphere, she might realised she didn't feel the same way anymore (cold feet). For this reason, the numbers that you'd get from girls at a party or clubbing is usually low yield.

    • Opinion Owner, I agree with that possibility taking place those two years ago, but I disagree about the recent baby shower since she was there for about an hour and only had a root beer (Haha). It was broad daylight and we talked for a good half hour during which time I saw that her body language was very open to me and engaged in conversation. She was genuinely laughing at my cheesy jokes, which 9/10 times meant that the girl liked me, and she asked me for my number before leaving, so she really has me confused at this point.

    • I guess I was generalising with that statement based on my experience getting phone numbers from girls at night clubs. But either way her not giving you a straight answer, is a pretty clear indication that she is not interested. I've never had a girl who was truly interested in me say no to a date, I've had girls cancel appointments with her friends to come on a date with me. Sometimes they might try and play hard to get, but their goal is still to be gotten. This girl doesn't really seem like she's playing hard to get, personally I would move on. If she really liked you, she'd get back to you.

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What Guys Said 1

  • probably not interested


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