2 days ago, it was confirmed that he is leaving in 9 days. I kept asking him to meet up with me for bkfast, lunch, a walk, anything, before he leaves. I just wanted to meet him. He said he needs to pack his clothes, how he is still working 6 of the 9 days, how he is feeling stressed and busy. He said he will be back to visit during the 4th of July and that is when he would like to meet me. He said if it goes well, we can visit eachother every month until October when he moves back. I told him I want to meet him before July 4th, even if it's for 10 minutes. He got snippy and said "I am really stressed out over here. I have 9 days to pack up and move to a different state. I'm still working, I need to say goodbye to my family. I'm trying to make this work out for us but you are not bending at all"
i dont understand. The only stuff he needs to move is his clothing. His company is setting him up in a furnished apt and paying for his current apartment while he's away. Why is it so hard to meet me for 10 minutes?
Most Helpful Guy
Ugh, I had to go through exactly the same situation with someone I met on okcupid. She kept saying she didn't want to meet up because she was moving away. It was bullshit.
Most Helpful Girl
Sounds like he's just not ready. He's stressed, has a lot on his mind, and meeting a new person is added stress as well. He's probably already thought about what would happen if you hit it off and then tried to continue with something after he moves. For a guy, even coming up with something to do and meeting someone new can be nerve racking. I think you pressuring him is making him pull back even more, to be honest. It's all too much.
It stinks that the timing is bad and that he isn't as eager to lock something in with you. However, I think stepping back in this case will be helpful. Give him some space and be understanding of his situation. He may just be a flake who wasn't taking this serious to begin with, or he may be a good guy with a lot going on.
Either way, backing off and letting him come to you will help regardless.