How do you lure something apathetically?

A couple of weeks of carousing dating advice websites and articles has repeatedly insisted upon me the idea that women prefer men who do not want them all that much. Who make them wait for responses to calls and texts, who is not too mindful of what she wants and who all around seems to be apathetic to her to one degree or another. Someone who does not pay her too much attention but instead has her seeking his.

Alright, I get that. But how do you get to that point? How do you make it so that your apathy is relevant to these women? How aren't you just some other random person on the street that doesn't care about her? How do you manage that initial interest and how do you get her to wonder about you in a romantic context?


Most Helpful Girl

  • Honestly, I would not want be interested in someone that is apathetic toward me. However, this is what I would suggest - do what you will with it. I get interested in a guy when he shows subtle interest in me. For instance, I get interested when a guy will do something small but still sweet - like helping me with homework, really listening to what I say, or etc. That being said that is only the first step. Like I said it is important to show subtle interest - you do not want to come off as desperate. After you show some signs of subtle interest wait for her to respond - it will most likely be very subtle as she tries to test the waters. However, if she doesn't respond she may not be interested. Hope this helps.

    • What's the line for "subtle"? And how would I know it's working?

    • It's hard to give an exact line for subtle, but I would start with the small things mentioned above. In terms of how often to do these "sweet type" things, I would do them somewhat unexpectedly and randomly, occasionally but not all the time. (The idea is that you want to show that you're a nice guy, but not a doormat.) If she responds positively, like most girls will unless they're just rude, slowly start flirting. This should be very subtle at first - like a random well timed smile.

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What Girls Said 1

  • I don't know who keeps writing these articles. They need to be gathered and burned, please stop reading them. Noone likes a clinger, but as a straightforward girl, I can tell you I only like who likes me. Period. Try starting up a conversation, and if that goes well just ask her out.

    • I've tried that. But it's always a no or an apathetic yes that turns into rescheduling and ignoring me or the classic "I just like you as a friend". I've gotten my share of the latter especially. It seems like being obvious and straightforward about my interest never gets me anywhere.

    • Maybe it's time to re-evaluate the type of women you go after and why.

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