I'm not a talker or a socializing kind of person. Should I, or should I not ask this girl out?

To begin with, I'm not a person who enjoy socialising. I usually spend most of my days alone and I don't talk much.

So there's this girl I have an infatuation on. I know it's an infatuation because I don't know her very well, we don't seem to have similar hobbies, we exchange pleasantries but don't know what to say to each other. Which is normal for me - when I talk with most other people this happens a lot.

But she's a nice, dependable girl, she seems kinda interested in going out. I'm nervous and excited about asking her out, but I'm just not sure if I should.

It should be easy to get along when we're outside and doing something together, having fun. But I'm guessing after we head home and stuff, we wouldn't have anything to talk about again. We wouldn't text, we wouldn't call, there wouldn't be anything interesting to talk about.

It's stressful because we all have this common image of relationships being full of texting and calling and what now. But it's not who I am. And I also have this doubt that - perhaps if I can't talk to her, then she's not the one for me.

So I don't know if I should really ask her out. Or should I just make an attempt to exchange texts with her for a week or two., if it's super awkward then stop. This is way more stressful than I first thought it out to be.


Most Helpful Girl

  • I think you should go with your second idea, to just text and talk for a while before asking her out. But texting has the disadvantage that you forget how to talk in real life. You may form a false image of her through text messages and then you won't know how to actually interact with her. But if you can't talk to her in real life, then it seems pointless to ask her out.

    • Does that really happen haha? If I can talk with someone over text, I think I should be able to talk with them in real life. Because I'd know what topics we could talk about. I know what interests her, she knows what interests me, that sort of thing.

    • That's true. But you don't know how she reacts. Don't you feel more comfortable talking over text? Your reaction are wittier, you are more confident etc. Texting is less personal and gives you more time to think. So your reactions over text may be different than those in real life. So it doesn't really teach you how to talk to that person.

    • Oh okay, I get what you mean now.

Have an opinion?

What Girls Said 2

  • What do you mean" it's not who you are " ?

    Has she an outgoing personality?

    • That quote meant that.. I just cannot keep up any kind of conversation with anyone unless I'm physically right where they are, and we're doing something interesting, be it having lunch, at the mall, etc. Otherwise I just have nothing I want to text any girl about. And a relationship is all about being so unseparable that you can't help but want to text the other person the whole time right? But it doesn't sound like what I would do.

      Oh and no she's not very outgoing either haha.

  • You seem more nervous then anything else. You take it day at a time ;)

    • hah i have no idea i was feeling nervous. But it's possible. Thanks for your advice. :)

What Guys Said 2

  • Don't ask her out.

  • Ask her out...