Planning dates with my ex-gf, not going good, any advice?

My ex-gf and I who I'm now dating had planned to go to diner together tomorrow. I asked her if we could make it a later diner because I'd probably be working late tomorrow. She told me she couldn't because she was sleeping at a friends house tomorrow night and was going to spend time in the evening with her. So she was babysitting and just finished and told me to come over. I was on my way to hang out with the guys and got the call. She said to just pop over for a second to see her, so I turned around and went to her house. She came out, we started kissing and cuddling, then asks me if I could drive her to her friends house. I got slightly annoyed and even asked her if she just asked me to come over to drive her. I didn't mind doing this as her boyfriend but when were not in a relationship and just dating feels kinda weird. Anyways I gave her a ride to be nice. Since diner was off for tomorrow I asked her if she wanted to hang on the weekend at all, because she told me she was going to a party with friends on Thursday. She told me she was busy with her friends on Saturday and I mention Friday . Then she begins telling me how there might be a party on Friday night, and she wants to go the the party to get to know people better. She doesn't even know if there is going to be one, was just assuming because she would want to miss out on it. Then I just straight up asked her if she even wanted to hang out with me, she said ya but had other stuff she had to go around. I get that where not in a relationship anymore, but I feel like I'm a second or third priority again, just like last time, meanwhile I'm putting her way up there. She talks about going to see all these different guy friends during the week, and she would hate it if I brought up conversations like that but I just sit and listen because apparently that's what she wants to tell me and if I told her I didn't care then she would think this guy doesn't give a crap about me which is the complete opposite of how I feel for this girl. I don't know do I just sit back and let her come back to me more? Any advice? Thanks?


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What Girls Said 1

  • She is not that interested, otherwise she would invite you to the party she is supposedly going. I believe she is using you.


What Guys Said 1

  • Well, last week I sort of kept contact with my ex-gf and remained being nice to see if we could work things through (even though I was the dumper). It didn't work.

    She was very happy to talk to me when I visited her place, but did not really want to cuddle. Which she must have put a lot of effort into not doing because she likes to cuddle a lot and hadn't been cuddled for I expect days.

    But the thing is I learnt that my exes tend to see relationships as on/off. There is no inbetween button.
    You should see them as spoilt girls who take take take and think of you as a beta man - because you do everything for them and always remain nice to them.

    Put you foot down and don't take this disrespect. She's just using you and completely disrespects you in my honest opinion. Remain fairly nice but don't take any of her bullsh1t. Men have to take the lead and so you should in this post-breakup situation too.

    I unfortunately don't know how to get an ex back though. But I think don't let her disrespect you, taking the lead and showing you care for her (sometimes) is probably the best option here.