I want him, but he has a girlfriend and is interested in me too. What should I do?

He likes me and i like him too, but I am getting frustrated. I dont have anything out of this situation.
We don't meet often as he doesn't want to take any risks to cheat on her, but his texts are clear.

Recently, I've told him that I am fed up with this texting etc.
I had even told to stop contact, but he contacted me a week later.
I can't take him seriously anymore, because he makes hints to meet, but doesn't follow up. I just can't take it anymore and have started dating other people.

I used to get angry at him, when he couldn't make it or had to postpone dates, but I've become cold towards him.
When he texts me, the first thing is to get angry and then I calm down.
I can't deal with the mixed feelings. On the one hand, he tells me he wants to see me etc, but on the other hand, he doesn't follow up. I just feel so stupid and played, but he knows that as I have already told him.
The feelings i have developed towards him are no longer healthy. I feel resentful and I feel hate towards him for treating me as he does


Most Helpful Guy

  • If he's willing to flirt with other girls (you) while he's with a girlfriend (her), what makes you think he won't do the same to you. Guy sounds like he just doesn't know what he wants, you need to decide if you want to be with that sort of guy, and, I don't think you really do deep down

    • lol I expectdd this answer. This is risk of course. Well if he does this, I know that I have the upper hand if we are together and I'll just do the same to him, simple and easy.

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    • I know it was doomed. I am not asking for this, he is by sending all those mixed signals. What am I expected to do. I've deleted his number many times, but he's always reached out again

    • yes, it's developing towards a very unhealthy direction...

Most Helpful Girl

  • ... I don't have anything out of this situation...
    End the madness, Get back your Life that has had Nothing but Strife With... The first thing is to get angry and then I calm down.
    You are In what I call a "Triangle Threesome," where you way at the top, looking down, from side to side, at the both of Them. And the More he comes around, the More he is toil and trouble and it has gotten to the breaking point now Where... The feelings I have developed towards him are no longer healthy.
    Along with being taken, he is Taking terrible advantage of You and your heart, Mistaking Kindness and patience for weakness.
    You Need to Stop Enabling him to Continue down this battered beaten path because it seems he will Never leave her, will never change his pattern and Never... Stop Playing around with You.
    His 'Texts are clear' here, dear but with me, the writing on the wall and All Spells: Block him from my life.
    Good luck. xx

    • well said.. describes it so well! even a nice text from him makes me upset

    • Thank you, sweetie, and do not let him have his sweet cake with her and You.. Move on, you deserve better.:)) xx

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Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 2

  • First of all, you should definitely not involve yourself with him like anonymous already said. Second, the humane thing to do would be to inform his girlfriend, if you can that is, of his activities. She has a right to know that she's with someone who's borderline cheating.

    • I know, I have her details, he doesn't know that. I am seirously considering it, since he didn't follow up on our maybe date (even though he was busy etc.). I am angry and want to tell her. He is making a fool of me and playing some kind of games. I doesn't know what he wants, but the should tell me then

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    • well we have met but nothing happened, it was "platonic", because I made it clear that I am not going to have sex with him under these circumstances

    • You more or less did the right thing by not having sex with him. It's best you tell the girlfriend and move on.

  • Delete his number. Don't respond to his texts. If he doesn't get the picture, tell his girlfriend.


What Girls Said 3

  • Sounds like you need to get rid of him! If he likes you so much he would have broken up with his girlfriend.
    The other problem is that if he is like this with his girlfriend now, he could just as likely do the same thing to you if you were in a relationship with him.

  • Do you really think he is going to leave his gf?

    • no, that's why I am being rude to him and telling him he is a jerk and an asshole, but he keeps contacting me. it's just too funny. I am insulting and criticizing him all the time and he puts up wit his shit. whyyyy

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    • I did not want to offen you by any means. I didn't understand why you thought it wasn't right to tell her.
      You're right with the second point - I don't know if I want the hassle, but I don't really care. She lives in another country (which is even worse, because she can't do much about him from afar)

    • ok again that is relevant...

      I guess i didn't think you should tell her as in my experience people make mistakes and sometimes its unfair to hurt an innocent person if it hasn't progressed however this has... if he is in a long distance relationship though its different... While i dont condone it, its one thing messaging a girl and being with your girlfriend all the time as realistically nothing will come of the texting. but if all she has is his messages and he is doing the same with you, it brings the cheat level up somewhat.

      Either way i think you need to block him. this is not a man you can trust.

  • Guuuuhhh, dunno why u like this kind of guys, they are shits


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