Standing up a guy?

We started dating a few weeks ago and we hit it off immediately. We are really into each other and I can tell he really likes me but I found some red flags. I have said nothing about it.

He's a musician and has got a concert which he really wanted me to attend. Should I tell him I am going and not turn up at all? That's a peaceful and good way to end it, hey? And blocking his Facebook as well as his phone number after.


Most Helpful Guy

  • Dude, that is REALLY cold-blooded of you. What the heck did this guy do? Did you find out he is a felon or something?

    The classy way to do this is to tell the truth. If you're too shy to say it in person or over the phone then shoot a text. If he wants to get weird about it then that's on him. But let's be real here... if he was truly a weird, stalker, creepster kind of guy then he would just do those things whether you block him on Facebook or not. Know what I mean? So just be honest about it instead of doing weird stuff.

    And like Koibito said, it's not a peaceful way what you're doing. That's rude and antagonizing.

    • But I thought guys are insensitive and can take the bullet actually. And I haven't actually insulted him or hurt his ego, you know. He might not even care, LOL

    • Exactly, they can take the bullet. So tell him straight up. Being sneaky the way you are more angry-inducing than anything.

Most Helpful Girl

  • What are the Red Flags. Is he married? An Old guy or a liar? if not I don't see why not. He might be a single rock star but he just might be looking to score a groupie...

    Suggest going with him to the concert if you are dating. and then that means you are going with each other if you are seeing each other...

    if not,... he is either a liar nor wants a hook up and did it via social media. Your call.

    • No, I am not a groupie. Not a big fan of their music anyway and the genres. You see, if I do all these things it is peaceful without any drama because no more words are exchanged. Won't they get the idea?

    • They might. If not you might have to do the Let Down Gently. (glad your not a groupie or want to be treated like one)

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What Guys Said 2

  • I wish guys didn't overreact when girls aren't interested. Now girls have this fear to say the truth. If you're no longer interested just tell him. If he starts to be rude hang up then block him. This can be really hurtful to somepeople. I know if I was being rejected I'd want to know why.

    • Yeah dude, I so agree. I just had this chick give me a "rain check" for a second date. Based on past experiences I was ready to toss this away but now a buddy of mine is telling me not to read too much into it. I mean, I'm interested but I don't want to come off as a creep or stalker if I keep trying to contact her, know what I mean? Again, it's just one of those things I think where chicks are just scared to tell the truth.

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    • That's generalizing and he sounds like he might actually be getting feelings. Just tell him you aren't interested there is no going wrong with that. besides he Saud specifically he's all about trust that would be diirect blow to him in the worst way.

    • It's not that I'm not interested but it's because of the red flags that are raised. I wanted to do this because of it.

  • You shouldn't lie. Lying and blocking is not a peaceful way haha.

    Just tell him that you realised you didn't feel comfortable hanging out with him, sorry for the trouble, goodbye, then block him I suppose.

    • But that would actually cause trouble and drama. He would ask why and it could end up in a big fight. Then what if we see each other in the streets again? It's better to cut him off everything and pretend that nothing happened.

    • Lol basically the end goal is the same, isn't it? To block him.

      Say you're going -> Secretly not go -> Block him
      Say you're not interested in him -> Not go -> Block him

      It's kinda the same, except in the former you're giving him fair warning not to come after you again. But if you think you might not be able to turn him down if he tries to insist, then just comment and block before he has a chance to reply.

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