Why won't he talk to me?

I have been with my boyfriend for a year and a half. We don't live together. We are in our 30's. We had an argument over something I heard that alluded to him seeing someone else. I asked him about it via text and he said he would email me but it might be a while before he can get to it. After hearing nothing for 3 days, I got upset and told him not to bother emailing me. He has not talked to me since. It has been over a week. I have apologized repeatedly and no response. I am devastated. How can a man who said he loves me ignore me like this. It hurts so bad. He won't even tell me to leave him alone or we are broken up. It is hard to give him the space he probably needs because I feel if we don't talk, he will forget about me. I am confused and don't know what to do. What if he never talks to me again?

Any advice is appreciated. Thank you.

Still nothing from him. I am officially giving up. 😢


Most Helpful Guy

  • Well, it's hard to say what is going on with this guy but you should rule out some of the freaky possibilities, like if he is dead (he wouldn't talk to you then), or if his plane went down near a tropical island and he now has only has a volley ball named 'wilson' for a friend. Also there is the brief visit to jail among some of the other bizarre things that could happen. So make sure he is alive and well and got your message first.

    If he is OK and he is just outright ignoring you (which is a real dick thing to do to anyone), you'll have to move on or suffer a non-communicator as a mate. You might still be able to get a few things out of the relationship at that point. Analyzing things like whether or not you two had conflicting goals or fought a lot might provide additional insight.

    But anyway, first thing is first. See if he isn't in the morgue.

    • Thank you for taking the time to respond. I know he is not dead. At this point, though, I would prefer he was stranded on a desert island WITHOUT the luxury of even a volleyball for a friend!! ; ) Then, maybe he would know what it feels like to feel alone. I think you are probably right. He is just being an insensitive jerk. : (

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    • I wish he was in a Mexican jail. Unfortunately, I called him the other day from a private number and he answered. I had a feeling he blocked my number. I didn't say anything when he picked up, though. I felt shady. So, I don't think he's in jail. He is being very childish. I have never seen this side of him. He has never ignored me before. I just don't get it. I guess I wasn't as important to him as I thought I was.

      Thanks for the story, though. : )

    • You did the right thing. You confirmed he existed and called him from the unblocked number. Now you know that this guy is a jerk and doesn't deserve you.

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What Guys Said 1

  • Well there's one of three options here. He either is cheating and just didn't want to deal with you being upset about it, so he went with the other girl and is just never going to reply to you.

    He's upset that you even accused him of something that he doesn't feel like he would ever do and is rethinking the relationship entirely.

    Or he's just legitimately extremely busy and can't deal with a dramatic situation, that will take away from the time and effort he has to put in to whatever he's busy with at the moment.

    Is this a big work week for him or something?

    • Thank you for responding. I would have to probably choose option three. He does have a lot of stress right now in his career and personal life. I just don't understand why he can't take 5 minutes out of his day to text or call to answer me. Is it really that painstakingly hard?

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    • It has been a very long time since he's replied to you. At this point it would be understandable to ask his friends, family or coworkers (I hope you know some of them by now) where he is. This isn't exactly a healthy way to handle a relationship.

    • Well, his friend has seen him so I know he's alive. He is just ignoring me. : (

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