Did I overreact to the situation (VERY LONG)?

My boyfriend and I are long distance and I finally met him in person at the beginning of the month and we stayed in his room for days. During that time I noticed he didn't really save any numbers on his phone and I played on his phone whenever my phone died and played on his only active social media account where I stumbled upon messages of him asking another girl for her number because he lost it.

1st of all, I'm really not that nosy. I was messaging friends on his account and was checking to see if my messages were even going through because we had a bit of a bad connection.

2nd of all, he always needs to know who exactly I'm talking to. I really don't have an issue telling him this since I talk about everyone I know, not really in a bad way, just how I see them.


so anyways, I see their short messages and I see they're from March and at this point I'm like, "who is this? Why have I never heard of her?"

And he tries to tell me "she's just a friend, we lost touch when I got a new phone. She was in a really bad place when we last talked and I just wanted to know if she's okay."

But at this point I just don't want to hear it. I'm tearing through he dresser, throwing my clothes in my bags and I'm putting on make up up while looking for a place to stay while he's sitting beside me begging me not to leave. I'm crying, he's getting angry and basically I just tell him he's a dick and that I'm tired of him getting on me for not telling him everything when I do and I find things about him way later than I should. I slapped him twice because he did say things that were very hurtful.

But I stayed with him and apologized.

Do you think I overreacted?


Most Helpful Guy

  • First off I think you've made a classic mistake in thinking you can ever really know someone online. Building a relationship is something you do over time, not with a computer or phone. Does he want a committed relationship?, have you even asked him? If you're the kind of person that does want that then long distance is going to make it that much more difficult because trust is a hard thing to build.


Most Helpful Girl

  • I think that is overreacting since you have no evidence that they are "involved" with each other. It is okay to talk to members of the opposite sex while in a relationship. I think you are a little too insecure over this because it would be a different story if you found messages of him professing his love to her and telling her how sexy she is etc.


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What Guys Said 0

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What Girls Said 1

  • You WAY overreacted. Like way way badly. He was talking with a distraught friend and wanted to see how she was doing. That's all. He wasn't flirting or anything.

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