Girlfriend has been acting depressed for months, how can I help her?

My girlfriend and I have been together for just over a year; we have a house together and pretty much fell head over heals for each other from the start. She moved 4 hours away for college, and we had Skype dates literally every night. She couldn't afford to go to college so she had to move back, when she did I lived with my parents (mind we're both 18). She was given the boot at 18, her dad hoping she'd go to college that year. So needless to say I was there for her, she was going to be living with me and my mom. That morning on her way home she had a car accident, I was there as soon as I got the call. Her parents following an hour later (they got the call first).

From that day she was depressed, never diagnosed by anyone, but it wasn't hard to see. She lost her car, owed her parents $3,000 for it and didn't have any means to get to work nor did she have a job. I helped her, found a car with the last of her savings, threw money left and right to make sure that car was going to be safe and help her pay off accident bills. That was 7 months ago, all her bills are now complete and its still here. We got our own place in May, beautiful little home right in town, it couldn't be better. It's cheap, easy to afford we're both working 2 jobs. Now to this morning.

She tells me she doesn't want to go to her second job, where I work I got her a job there. I told her she calls out too much, she has to go! She was pissed when I had no sympathy. (Ran out of typing room I'll finish)
Update: From the moment I started cleaning the house, the house is now spotless. I organized our bedroom, moved things around so it'd look wonderful when she got home. She came home she was furious, I yelled her name and excitement and greeted her at the door as normal, she hugged me. She wouldn't let go, I don't generally like hugs that last longer than 5-10 seconds. She made some food and we talked a bit. Then she wanted to cuddle before going to work. So we got in bed.

(Please don't judge me for rushing things with her, we honestly had a relationship for 4 years in the past and broke up because lack of communication. I'm the only person she's ever been with and I've only been with 1 other person...)

She went through a lot almost 8 months ago now, and I just don't see it's still affecting her. She doesn't even remember anything about the accident. She told me it all just feels like a blur. So now there is no reason to be sad everyday. There is no reason to be mad at me because I didn't want to lay still on a bed?


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What Girls Said 2

  • Depression is depression and no relationship is going to make that better. She is probably happy with you but she has her own issues deep down. Just stay supportive and let her know you're there for her.

  • well it seems like she's been through a lot and she just needs a shoulder to cry on and someone to tell her its all gonna be ok. just be there for her and offer to talk about it or just cry about it. And never forget to treat her like a princess. we all love that


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