Parents don't like my boyfriend?

They've been uncomfortable with him since day 1, but we've been together for two years now. Surely they should have been able to accept our relationship by now... they never ask about him and shut down when I mention him.

I think the main issue is that he's Catholic and we're not. My parents have never had an issue with my friends not being of the same religion as us, but they clearly don't like that my boyfriend isn't. The other issues for them are that we met online and he's older than me - both valid reasons for them to be suspicious at first, but they've met him once and he was a perfect gentleman. How can I make them see that he's the guy for me?


Most Helpful Guy

  • Is he financially secured? Any children or exes? Does he have a decent job? Any strange or bad habits like gambling, drinking, being rough or uneducated? Is he kind and honest?

    • He recently went back to school and had to take out a loan but has decent savings from his past jobs. No kids, no exes. Plans to find a job as soon as he graduates with his second degree. No bad habits. Very kind and very honest.

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    • Nah, he has less than a year left. It's an advanced two-year program; he's 29 so he plans to work right after. He got several excellent scholarships so he'll only owe about $9000. We'll both graduate next May and I plan to start working early next year once my classes have finished.

      We definitely won't get married until we're both financially stable, meaning 2-3 years from now. But that's not the issue - it's not like I talk to my parents about marrying him, that's just something he and I discuss. The issue is that they won't even inquire as to how things are going or what he's up to and they totally shut down the minute I mention his name.

      I'm definitely saving up whatever I can, but he wants to pay off his debt himself. That's fine; I'll be able to share the cost of our wedding, house and raising kids.

    • If you both are financially secured then there shouldn't be anything to worry about. Most parents are worried more or less about your life security - which consist primarily of 70% finance and 30% of everything else.

      Also, you should plan out on how much you each would be making and if you still want to marry after looking at the marriage tax penalty. In general, if you are making similar amount of money then you should not get married as you each you pay less tax than if you were married. If you are earning differently then you might be able to save on taxes if you get married.

      Also, if you save $5000 on your wedding/honeymoon then you can put that money into some sort of savings/fund for your future kids. Make your wedding simple and as cheap as you can get away with (I'd personally skip everything and go with the church/dress/photoshoot only). It always bugs me to no end when people have to spend so much on weddings, that only lasts for a couple days, and not enough on savings.

Most Helpful Girl

  • Awh this is a nice story (: the whole meeting online and being together for two years part haha. They eventually need to get over it.. I mean are you guys talking about getting married? Maybe they should meet his parents and realize he has a great family and work it out. Or force the topic into your parents and tell them you love him and they have to accept it? I dunno just an idea

    • Lol thanks ☺️ Oh yeah, we've talked about getting married for like a year and a half now! You're right, maybe if my parents met his family they'd realize he comes from a good background...

    • Yeah exactly haha :) good luck

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What Girls Said 1

  • Kill your parents.

    Jk but honestly it's none of their business. Don't include hem in things if they aren't going to respect who you love. Parents aren't gods to their children, you don't own them your happiness and future.


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