Now, I own my bussiness and of course I work alone (but I have clients), sometimes I work with my mother when I need her.
From my teenage years, I didn't keep any friends (I hadn't a lot anyway). I don't feel like I need friends, they won't feed me or be more important than my own life. Back then, I wasn't comfortable around people of my age, I was shy and they always made me feel like I was the worst on earth.
Now, I'm comfortable with people, I'm still reserved but not shy anymore! See my sister has a new boyfriend, I've only seen him once and I already starts to laugh and joke with him, I couldn't do that when I was 14. There was even a time when I was shy with my own family.
But I'm in my bubble, "work and family" that's all. The average age of my clients is 50yo, men and more women, sometimes I have 25yo too but I don't want to cross the line between a work relationship and a love relationship, I'm not confident with it and that's sound inappropriate to flirt with clients.
I don't really know how to escape, I know I don't need friends but maybe they are the key to escape.
I'm really missing a boyfriend (which I never had btw) there's this guy I saw twice in a shop but I don't know, he looks me straight in the eyes a lot when he talk and seems to care when I come back but that's the same, he won't do anything because he's at his work.