Okay, I've had this best friend since we were in the 6th grade. We are now 21 and 22. I've been to all of her family gatherings, her family considers me family. She has an older cousin, he's only 24, he's in the military. He was down for about a month or so, and we hung out a couple of times. Each time we ended up drunk and sleeping next to each other and cuddling and just talking until we were sober. The best sleep I've had in a long time. Nothing more happened. He is the complete opposite of what I've always aimed for. I like tall country assholes, and he's this sweet well thought out guy only two inches taller than me with his life together. I smile every time I think of him or someone brings him up. However he is back home now. My friend, her boy friend, and I are going to visit him soon. I don't know if I'm looking for more or if it was just really nice to lay next to someone. To have someone hold me like they cared... None of this makes sense I know. I just had to talk about it because I can't talk about it to my best friend. Any advice would be great.