Are these signs I could be the other woman?

Everything seems to be going great between us. He seems very serious about me and the relationship but these are some random issues I have, which I have not addressed yet to him. We've been dating for a little over 2 months now.

-He's 10 years older than me.
-He's told me he's apparently not married, nor have had children before. I do not know why, but when he told me this after he asked if we could date exclusively, I got the vibe he was lying.
-Apparently lives with a sibling. Haven't met a friend/family member yet.
-When we spoke about our views on sex, he at one point said that he dislikes to have sex with a woman he's not emotionally/attracted to, because it's such a drain on him. This sort of reminded me of a marriage relationship, where at times one after a while doesn't feel attracted to the other (maybe).
-We haven't slept together yet. When he asked me when I would feel comfortable doing so, I told that I wouldn't want to interfere and come to his house, with his sister there. So he suggested a nice hotel.
-At first, he would take me to places that were at least 20 minutes drive away, and takes me to the movies a lot. I sort of questioned this, but he would say that he loves the place. Lately he's been taking me to places that are closer, and much busier.
-When we're out and having dinner, he will usually look around the room a lot (not sure if this is a sign of a controlling man or..)


Most Helpful Guy

  • This is reminiscent of a relationship a friend of mine was in with the same age gap. At 41, he had never been married or living with anyone, etc. I told her that she should be very suspicious, and that he might have a double life or something. In the end, I was wrong about the double life; it turned out the reason he was very single all that time was his epic temper. Still, my advice about suspicion was good advice and it'll probably be good for you, too.


Most Helpful Girl

  • Older - thinks he can fool you
    Not married - WHO is when trolling for a mistress
    Lives w/sibling - actually his SO/wife/other
    Sex must include attraction - smoke screen
    Sex timetable - fish or cut bait, other woman you
    Outings - you are not to be seen, then reported back to SO
    On the lookout - can't relax until joint is cased, doesn't want to be surprised by "reporters", at least w/o a story at the ready if he can't duck out first when one is spotted or he can approach them w/o you to head them off with a lie

    Guess you'll have to meet the sister ASAP.
    If she really IS the sister, then cultivating a friendship with her can eventually spill the beans where (& with whom) he REALLY lives

    It easy to agree with your evidence but now I wonder why you allowed to build to such epic proportions... you must really love him?

    • This is spot on, coming from a 31 year old too, has experience/intelligence behind it

    • You make an awful lot of assumptions.

    • Not the only one to have been there done that in my group
      You don't even have to be social to be aware of these "tells", even the 60's has plenty of movies with these moves featured... lets' see an example... might be... Doris Day, Rock Hudson in Pillow Talk, 1959

Recommended Questions


Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 1

  • Yeah... they could be.
    They could also be signs that you're seeing ghosts.
    There's really know way of knowing, unless you confront him... and risk looking like a crazy person if you're wrong in your accusations.


What Girls Said 0

The only opinion from girls was selected the Most Helpful Opinion, but you can still contribute by sharing an opinion!

Recommended myTakes