How can I get over my lack of confidence if Im actually ugly?

Im ugly and 100% sure of that people tell me all the time but this has caused me to lag in everything including my career. I dont know what to do I get fidgety and scared when Im around people and I can't even make friends. I know due to my looks Im never gonna have a girlfriend thats a fact (no confidence on a ugly guy doesn't attract women) but I would like to have some friends but nobody likes to be around me


Most Helpful Guy

  • Imagine a world were everyone is beautiful... you can't wanna know why? Beauty if seen on a scale of least beautiful to most or ugly to gourgeous will always have some people who are at the top and some at the bottom. There will always be uggos even if those uggos would've been beautiful in a different set of circumstances. So to be honest things like ugly and beautiful are usually comparative. People often tell me I'm handsome and very good looking. I've never believed this or fealt this way because these things are never said to me if I'm with my cousins or my brother. I get pushed into the background and completely ignored. So when someone says I'm handsome all I hear is most people I know of to compare you to doesn't look as appealing to me as you do. So ugly or beautiful isn't a physical characteristic of myself but rather a subjective observance by whoever is looking at me. Now I said all that to say subjectivity causes some really odd things to happen when it comes down to beauty. Beauty for many is heavily effected by what they look like, who their family is and who their past relations were with. So two people can look at me and come up with vastly different opinions. I've been called ugly before quite a few times. So how can I possibly be both ugly and gorgeous? if you think you're ugly it's simply because your choosing to accept the opinions of those who have called you that. For example my aunt was burned badly as a teenager accross her chest arms and lower part of her face. Now some people would say she's ugly and have even said so out loud but my uncle finds her absolutely beautiful. And I believe he believes that. They've been married for at least 24 years and they're probably one of the happiest couples I know. I could list out some other examples of conventionally different looking people I know that have found people that genuinely found them to be attractive but I think my point has been made. Beauty is truly in the eye of the beholder and if you can find a way too look at yourself and like what you see things would feel a lot better.

    • Well yeah But I disagree with you some people are belowe average looks and there is a ton of them and trust me people agree somewhat on what is and its not attractive

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    • Obiously. I wanna be considered hot by women which they consider me ugly in mayority specially the girls Im attracted to which suprisingly are not the typical hot girl. Only fat girls and ugly girls like me ugh

    • Well I can't help you then. You'll always be ugly. It's all about preception and your's is so fixed in what my perception tells me is a delusion that I'm not sure I could give you any advice that would help.

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What Guys Said 2

  • Dude, you're only ugly cause you say you are. You're not any more ugly than I am.
    It's your personality more than your appearance.

  • Indulge yourself more into self pity and get all your negative thoughts into your head deeper. That will make you overcome it.


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