I have no clue what to do, help?

There's this guy I met online and yeah I know it's weird that a 16 year old girl met a guy online who is 17 but I did. He's great and I'm really crushing but he's homeschooled because he works a full time job to pay for his car and help his mom who currently has cancer. I know what it's like to have a mom with cancer so I try and be there for him. He does rodeo and so he is very busy with work and rodeo. I understand that he has commitments and I do too. I go to school and I am in a sport. Anyway, the point to my question is he goes hours without replying to a text and I don't want to text him constantly so I kinda wait a couple hours to text again but after the 2nd time I kind of give up. I'm a loyal person and I don't want to talk to another guy but I need to feel appreciated and wanted. I have talked to him about how I feel many times then he says sorry and it won't happen again. he's good about it for a day or two then poof. Back to where we started. I've asked him if he even wants me in his life and he says yes but I just don't know what to do. I don't know if I should talk to him again about how I feel or move on. I'm very confused and I don't want to be hurt more than I already am. I don't want to waste my time on nothing. I'm really crushing. Im pretty sensitive so I'm sorry if this seems stupid.


Most Helpful Girl

  • Have you told him about your feelings towards him?
    And instead of asking him if he wants you in his life, have you asked him if he has the same romantic feelings for you too?

    Also, I'm sorry that you don't feel appreciated and wanted, but just remember that guys around that age need a lot of space, and the fact that he has to work, do schoolwork and rodeo, AND take care of his mom who has cancer can be really exhausting. He may be lacking much needed alone time for himself. I understand that you want to talk to him as much as you possibly can, but as you can tell, you can't exactly change him no matter how many times you ask him to. Just give him some space. He might just be busy with school, work, rodeo, or his mom, or he might just be catching up on sleep. He'll respond to you as soon as he finds the time. Just breathe and relax. I wish the best for you both!

    • Yes I've asked him if the feelings are mutual and he says yeah. He says he likes me a ton. I try and give him space but agh it's so frustrating that he won't let me help him. I know what it likes to have a sick/dying mom. I've been there a couple times. He always shuts me out when it comes to his feelings. I try to help and every time I try to budge a little to get him to open up. But I always hold back. You're right.. ill just give him some space. I'm scared that he'll just walk away.. You'd be surprised at how often it happens.

    • Hahaha, it's ok. That totally reminds me of my best friend. If he has problems, he'll cut himself off from everyone. He has actually done so for two weeks one time! He didn't talk to anybody and just locked himself in his room. Eventually, I have learned to give him space and let him know that I will be there for him whenever he needs me. That usually helps out more than me trying to force him to open up to me.

      So in short, just give him space and let him know that you'll always be there when he needs you. After he has some time to sort out his thoughts, he'll come to you on his own for advice and support. I hope things get better for you guys! Good luck!

    • Thank you so much

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Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 1

  • He isn't into a long distance relationship as much as you are.

    • I asked him about that before and he said that he trusts me and he's cool with it.

    • Show All
    • Yes some of them would... but if I were you I would be careful and don't be shocked if the relationship gets weird, uncomfortable, crazy, exhausting, questionable, or complicated.

    • Okay thank you so much 😊

What Girls Said 1

  • How do you know he is who he says he is?

    • We've talked on the phone, talked on snapchat daily, and I looked him up on Facebook. Well he popped up but I didn't send him a request.

    • So you actually have no idea in other words

    • I'm pretty sure.

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