What is it like to date a woman who clearly has more money than you/comes from a wealthier family?
What Guys Said 2
It depends what women mean by "more money."
I think a lot of women either convince themselves, or just try to state it externally to others that dating guys is "an issue" because "man are INTIMIDATED by the fact that she might be making more money than him."
It's called "projecting" and "projective identification" (Google it). It's very seductive for our sense of self-esteem to want to feel like (as a woman) we are so far apart from the "problems" that typically plague "other women."
For example, as a woman, I may not want to identify myself as "the kind of woman" who depends on a man for financial support, or for help with acquiring material things I want in life, or for help with children, or the house, or in life, or with anything.
Why? Because society says that there is something inherently "negative" and "bad" about women who are this way. Further, "men" (i. e., the people I want to have a relationship with) believe and agree that there is something "bad" or "negative" and "unattractive" about women who are this way.
So, I want to go through the mechanics of "negative reinforcement" to both "feel" (internally) and "appear" (externally to others) that "I am NOT" this negative thing.
So, the more I demonstrate how "opposite" I am to what I consider to be negative (based on what society and men consider to be negative), the "less negative" I feel about myself and identity.
So, maybe "telling myself" and "believing" something like the idea that "men are INTIMIDATED by a woman who makes more money than him" is exactly what my emotional world needs... to avoid negative feelings of identifying myself with negative female traits.
Yet, in doing so, I'm not actually accounting for "REALITY," objectively anyway.
In reality, men don't want a female partner who has "ZERO NEEDS OR WANTS." Someone who doesn't want sex, who doesn't want material things, and who doesn't want to feel taken care of or supported... AT ALL... EVER!
Right? Men are people too. And just like all people, men life to feel the pleasure in "giving." They want to feel like they're able to give their female partner positive and good feelings. And if they find a woman who "actively denies herself" the ability to enjoy certain good and positive feelings from men, because of some "emotional need to protect her sense of identity," THAT is WHY she has "an issue" with dating men... NOT because she "makes more money than men."
What Girls Said 0
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